Hidden Emotions
by Soph 6894
Summary: Hopefully a better version of what was to be 'Meeting Sara Sidle' Gil Grissom meets Sara Sidle for the first time, follow their journey through the seasons of CSI.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I hate what I decided to do, and you will all hate me for it, but it had to be done, I deleted my stories, they just weren't going to get finished, but I do plan to write another story that will be similar to 'Story of the Bullet Romance' I shouldn't have been starting new stories in the middle of writing one, it got me confused, you can send me hate mail if you want! I deserve it! I knew I would regret it but it had to be done ):**

**

* * *

  
**

_**Compressed Emotions**_

Introduction

Gil Grissom, a man in his mid thirties, working for the Las Vegas Crime Lab as a level three CSI, stood before the bright young students on his small stage, in front of him a desk with a microphone so his voice projected around the large room, nearly every seat in the room sat in by a student not much younger than twenty-five. His seminar was to be about crime scene investigation, teaching the university students the basics of it. He looked around the room, taking in the faces, seeing the concentration plastered on them. He then realised that they were waiting for him to start, and probably had been for the past ten minutes.

"Hello, my name is Gil Grissom, I'm with the Las Vegas Crime Lab and I'm going to be educating you in the basics of crime scene investigation..."

That was all Sara Sidle needed to be drawn into his words, his voice was angelic, _he _was angelic, his short, greying, curls made her want to run her hands through them, his well-built body looked strong, yet gentle, his words came out like silk. Her eyes shot to his left hand, checking for a wedding ring. She could have squealed with delight when she saw no ring, he had changed her opinion on men completely, she realised that they weren't all annoying, immature, idiots, that spent their time attempting to chat up women, coming out with annoying, idiotic comments, and having late night parties that went on until the early hours of the morning. There was finally a man in the world that had _the _effect on her. The one she had heard so much about but never experienced before, the one that made her go into a daze and feel like there was only the two of them in the room. She forced herself to focus on what he was saying and not on his bright, sparkling, baby-blue eyes that shone with emotion. It was then that their eyes met, she was sure that everyone in the room could hear the _'thump, thump, thump' _of her heart and even more sure that the man who had stolen it could see it pounding against her chest. In those few seconds she had felt like she was floating on cloud nine. Yes. She had finally felt true love.

By the end of the seminar Gil was sure he had bored the life out of the students, even though almost all of them had been taking notes, he wouldn't be surprised if one of the girls he had noticed had filled a full notebook, she could write for the country! He was sure she was writing at least 500 words for every minute, and yet, he was strangely intrigued by her, she was clearly very, very, clever, and he wanted to know more about her. He hoped she would attend his seminar the next day.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I realised I forgot to change the title on the first chapter/introduction, the story is called **_**Hidden Emotions**_**, I was going to call it **_**Compressed Emotions **_**but I thought **_**Hidden Emotions **_**would be better, I'm glad I noticed that before people started getting confused.**

**

* * *

**__

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter One

Once again Gil Grissom was stood on the stage, looking around the room at the faces of the people who made him feel old. Just looking at the bright young faces made him realise that he hadn't really lived at all. He knew that that feeling would stay with him for the rest of his life now. This time when he was looking at the faces he was looking for a certain one, the young girl who had made him feel _alive_, after scanning the room a second time he found her. Fourth row up, twelve seats along. He repeated it in his head until it was like a mantra. Once he had memorised her seat he started, realising he had been standing there for five minutes without starting.

"Hello, today is the second part of this three part seminar, today we will be looking at how to deal with any evidence you find, now if you look at these pictures... "

Once again his opening speech was all she needed to be drawn to his words, she held on to every word that came out of his perfect mouth and wrote it down. Sara thought she was going crazy, she hadn't felt like this before, sure there was the few men she had dated, but most of them lasted no longer than a month, and most just waited until they got what they wanted then disappeared. They must have found it fun to get a science geek like her into bed with them, and once they had got her into bed, all of their friends would know by the next day, and they wouldn't let it go.

After an hour in the room asking questions and looking at pictures Gil announced - with his perfect voice - that it was time for a break. Sara walked slowly out of room, hoping he would ask to see her, but with no luck once she got to the door she hurried out of the building to get her favourite spot, sat on a bench under the big tree. Once sat down she got her notes out of her bag and read through them, it was a habit she had, she liked to take in what she had wrote down. Sara had been reading them for about fifteen minutes when she felt someone sit down next to her, she looked out of the corner of her eye to find the very Gil Grissom sitting next to her.

Gil decided to break the silence first, "Hi" he said.

"Dr Grissom, hi" Sara smiled at him, he was sure his heart would jump out of his chest.

"I see you're reading your notes already" He stated.

"Um, yeah, its a habit I have"

He nodded slightly, "Are you enjoying the seminar?"

"Yeah! Its very informative, my supervisor told me I needed to come, I've only just started working there, I hate my supervisor, I wish I could quit" Sara sighed

Gil thought for a moment, "You know, there's an opening at the Crime Lab I work at, in Las Vegas, I'm sure they'd be willing to take you on"

Sara looked at him, she was shocked he was offering her a job at the place he worked, but she knew she needed to be near home, "Thanks, I appreciate it, I do, I really do, but I need to be near home," Sara could have sworn that Gil looked upset when she said that.

His heart dropped, "Oh, okay then"

"We better get going" Sara got up and walked back into the building, unaware of the older man staring at her from the bench.

Sara had found her seat and people were still coming back from their break, Gil had just entered the room and immediately found her, they locked eyes for a few seconds before he carried on walking to the stage and sorted everything out for the second half of the seminar.

After another two hours the seminar was over, Sara wasn't sure she would be able to go to the seminar the next day, she had to go to the hospital for her checkup, and she didn't know if she would be back in time, so she stayed behind to talk to Gil.

Gil turned around to find the bright young woman standing in front of him, "Can I help you... I'm sorry, I didn't get your name"

Sara smiled slightly, "Sorry, I forgot to tell you it, Sara Sidle" They shook hands, Sara wondered if he felt the same electricity that she felt

"Miss Sidle, how can I help you?"

Sara grinned, "Oh, call me Sara".

"Okay... Sara"

"Well, I just wanted to let you know that I'm not sure if I'll be able to make it to the seminar tomorrow, so... Um, if I can't, here's my number, if you need an extra pair of hands down at the lab, please, call me, I'd be willing to help out" Sara handed him a piece of paper ripped out of her notepad with her number scrawled on it, he noticed that her writing was very neat.

Gil was surprised, he had known her for a day, and she was giving him her number. "Thanks, I'll remember that" He tucked the card in his jacket pocket and tapped it slightly.

"Hopefully I'll be back in time, its my checkup at the hospital" Sara's eyes widened, she obviously wasn't supposed to say that, but Gil respected her privacy and didn't push it further.

"Okay, I hope you make it, tomorrows seminar is the last part and its about piecing everything together to find your suspect, its quite important"

Sara smiled slightly, "Well, I better get going, bye Dr Grissom" She started walking away when he called her name.

She turned around, "Yes?"

"Call me Grissom" He smiled.

Sara grinned, "Okay, bye... Grissom"


	3. Chapter 3

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter Two

Gil knew that he couldn't get his hopes up about Sara being at the seminar that day, so as he stood, for the third and final time, on that stage, watching as the last of the students walked into the room and found seats, he only quickly looked around the room for her, and didn't see her. Gil waited until he was sure everyone was ready, then began.

"Hello, today is the final part of this seminar, its about coming to a conclusion on your case, which suspect--if there is one, because it could be an accident--is responsible, how they did it, and how you know this, if anyone has any questions before we begin please raise your hands now"

Sara was sat in a room in the hospital, waiting for a nurse to return, she had been feeling a little ill lately, and was worried that she could be pregnant, she had recently broke up with her boyfriend of three weeks, and of course, she had been stupid and gave in to his teasing and had sex with him, that was all it was to her. Sex. She hadn't felt any emotion during or after, she had just wanted it to be over, and as soon as she could she had gotten ready and left his room. To throw up. She was too embarrassed to buy a test and she knew they weren't always right.

She had just given the nurse her urine sample and was waiting for the results. Sara looked around the plain room, she was used to hospitals, living in an abusive houshold, she had been in an out as a little girl. The room was small, it had two windows, both with plain, light blue curtains, white speckly flooring, with cream coloured, boring patterened walls, it had a single bed with two chairs, one either side. On the wall to the right side of sara was a diagram of the human body, it had labels all over it, some containing small bits of information.

"Miss Sidle" Sara looked up to see that the nurse had returned, she held her breath, hoping that it had came back negative.

"Yes?"

The nurse smiled at her, "Your urine sample came back negative"

Sara let out her breath and grinned, "Thank you" She got up and picked her jacket up from the chair it was drapped over.

"You're welcome, have a good day"

"You too" Sara hurried out of the room, then stopped and turned around, "Do you have the time?"

The nurse looked at the small silver watch on her wrist, "Its just gone half past eleven"

"Okay, thanks" If she hurried, Sara could be at the second half of the seminar, so she ran down the long, plain corridor, down the stairs, because the lifts in the hospital were slow, and out into the bright, morning, sunshine.

Once she was outside Sara got a taxi to the university, she ran into the building and luckily people were still walking into the seminar, so she calmed herself down and walked into the large room, as she sat down in a seat in the front row she looked at the front of the room to see Grissom looking through some notes.

Grissom looked up from his notes and saw Sara sat directly in front of him, he knew he wouldn't be able to concentrate with her sitting there, he tried his best to focus on most of the people in the room but it was hard with her there, her hair in a pony tail, a few loose strands framing her face, she was wearing a white tank top with black jeans and comfortable-looking shoes.

By the end of the seminar Grissom had gained control, he knew he probably wouldn't see Sara again once she had left the room, unless he needed help at the lab. Which was very, very, rare, the lab hadn't needed help in years, so there wasn't a good chance of him needing to phone her, so when everyone started leaving the room he walked up to her.

"Sara, I see you made it to the second part of my seminar"

She turned around and came face to face with him, "Grissom, hi, yeah, I'd just got back and thought I'd see if I wasn't too late, I got here just as people were coming back in"

"Oh good, you caught the most important part, I see you made a lot of notes" He said whilst motioning to the notebook in her hand, it had writing all over one page, Grissom noticed that some of it was in code. "You write in code?"

Sara blushed slightly at his comment, "Um, yeah, I only write in code if I don't want people to see what it means, um, not that this is anything private" She rushed the last bit of her sentence.

Grissom smirked, and shrugged his shoulders, "Hey, I race cockroaches"

Sara furrowed her eyebrows in confusion and shook her head slightly, "I'm not gonna ask how that works"

He smiled, "Well, I guess I wont be seeing you for a while, hopefully the lab will need help, if you ever want to work somewhere else, give me a call, the lab could do with someone like you" He scribbled his number down on a bit of paper and handed it to her.

Sara looked at him, "Thanks" They stood there for a short while, just looking at each other, before Grissom realised he had to meet someone.

"Oh, damn!" He cursed, after looking at his watch, "I need to be somewhere, I gotta go" He stopped and looked at her again, taking in her image, "Take care of yourself, Sara"

Sara smiled sadly, "I will, you too, Grissom" Her voice got quieter with every word.

"Bye" He whispered.

"Bye" Sara replied, equally as quiet. She watched him as he picked up his briefcase and walked out of the room, leaving Sara standing in the room alone. She picked up her rucksack and walked, slowly, out of the large room. Both of them knew there was very little chance of ever meeting again.

**A/N: Its not over yet! (:**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This chapter takes place a few years later (:**

**

* * *

  
**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter three

Sara Sidle was now a Level 3 CSI in San Francisco, she and Grissom had phoned each other every now and then, it was mostly him phoning her to see how she was doing at work, there were a few times when she phoned him to ask him for help on something. Sara was sure she could call them friends. There was something about him that made her want more, and more, every time they spoke, but she made sure she kept their conversations professional, she knew he was at least 10 years older than her.

Gil Grissom was also a Level 3 CSI, but he worked in Las Vegas, he had recently trained the newest CSI, Catherine Willows, he knew about her previous line of work, as an exotic dancer, but he also knew that she only did that for the money, she needed it to pay for her rent and her lessons on crime scene investigating, Grissom knew she would make a good CSI, and the team needed her to take Daniel's place.

Daniel King was a CSI level 1, he had decided he couldn't take all of the death and quit the job, he was only 21 when he started. Nick stokes had trained him, Nick was a CSI level 2, he had been at CSI for just over a year now and was trying his best to move up to CSI level 3. Their supervisor, Jim Brass, didn't think much of Nick, he thought he was just another 'kid' that needed money, but then again, Jim Brass didn't think much of anyone, to the graveyard shift he was just a grumpy old man who liked bossing people around.

Three years later the Graveyard shift had formed into a very close group of friends, there was Gil Grissom, a Level 3 CSI, who was also now the supervisor of Graveyard, Jim Brass had been moved back up to Homicide, Catherine Willows, she was aslo a CSI Level 3 now, Grissom knew she would make a great Criminalist, Nick Stokes, still a Level 2 CSI, and Warrick Brown, also a Level 2 CSI, he had joined Graveyard about a year and a half before, a new trainee had just been turned down a place, she couldn't handle the shift, so was suggested for Swing shift, so Grissom was expecting Holly Gribbs, who would be getting trained, to take the place. When Holly arrived Grissom had a feeling that she wouldn't make a good CSI, he took her blood and shortly after she felt lightheaded, she was short on blood sugar, he hoped she didn't have anything else that would effect her work, she also didn't look like the type of woman to be around dead people and blood, but then again, he had thought that about Catherine, until he saw her working.

Holly hadn't even been at CSI for a day, and she got shot. She had been threatened at the first scene, which was a shop, and then shot in the victims house, the suspect had returned, and Warrick had left her alone at the scene taking prints. The whole team was under pressure to finish a case about one of their own, so Grissom knew he had only one choice, she remembered Sara's words.

_"Here's my number, if you need an extra pair of hands down at the lab, please, call me, I'd be willing to help out." _

So he did just that. His hands shook as he dialled her number.

_"Hello?" _Even though he had heard her voice across the phone so many times before, his heart still thumped in his chest when she spoke.

"Sara, its Grissom, I need you to do a favour for me"

_"Okay, Grissom, are you okay? You don't sound too good."_

"No, I'm not ok, one of my CSI's has just been shot, I need you to come down here for a while and help out, would you be able to?"

_"I, um" _The line went silent for a while, it was obvious that Sara was thinking about it, he heard her mumbling something on the other end, _"Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can"_

Grissom let out a relieved sigh, "Sara, I owe you, thank you, so, so, much for this"

_"Its okay, I'll probably be there tomorrow, I'll phone you when I get to the airport"_

"Okay, thanks"

_"Bye, see you soon, Grissom"_

"Bye" He waited for the beep before he hung up, and then went to bed. Tomorrow he would have to tell the team about Sara's arrival, he couldn't wait to see her again. He fell asleep thinking about her, what would she look like now? Did she have family? He hoped she didn't, but he also knew he wouldn't be able to start a relationship with her while she was here. It was going to be hard having her around him again.

* * *

**A/N: I know this chapter is a little rusty, I'm tired and it was a tough chapter to write with all of the time changes, hopefully the next chapter will be better, sorry for it being a little short too.**


	5. Chapter 5

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter four

The next shift, Grissom gave Nick the Holly case and Catherine was to work with him on a case about a jackpot winner who was found lying in a pool of blood, it was obvious that he came from the hotel roof, they just needed to find out how, and if necessary, who did it, Warrick was on paid leave, although Grissom had yet to tell him.

"Wait a minute, you can't give him the Holly case." Grissom and Nick looked at her, "I mean, all due respect Nick, I want this one"

"Nicky is the only one who didn't have any personal contact with Holly. I don't want you on this, Catherine" Grissom told her sternly.

Catherine grabbed the assignment sheet from a very worried looking Nick. "Fire me" She spat.

"I'm not firing anybody, look, I know we're pulling a double, and we're on edge 'cause of Holly, I just want everyone to stay calm and do their jobs for the next ten hours." Grissom knew this would be the right time to tell them about Sara coming in, he knew that they probably wouldn't be very happy, but he had to tell them instead of Sara just showing up without anybody expecting her, "And as of now, we're short of help, so I'm bringing in Sara Sidle to give us a hand"

Catherine, Warrick, and Nick gave Grissom confused looks.

"Sara Sidle?" Catherine said, with obvious disgust in her voice.

Warrick spoke for the first time since Grissom arrived, "Who's that?" He asked.

"She's a CSI out of San Francisco, a friend of mine. Someone I trust" He looked at the trio, "She's going to handle our internal investigation and I want you to keep this in-hand. I don't want I.A. involved"

Nick nodded his head, while Catherine shook hers.

"Great, that's all we need. Somebody sniffing around" She said, obviously not impressed by him bringing someone in. Catherine stormed out of the room.

"Nicky, you can back me up on the D.B at the Monico"

"You got it" Nick said, while taking the assignment slip from Grissom.

"That's it" Grissom said, looking at Warrick. Nick gave Warrick a sympathetic look before leaving the room.

Grissom told a persistent Warrick about his paid leave, then left to find Nick and go to their crime scene.

A few hours later Grissom was taking pictures of the simulation dummies Nick had thrown off the roof, he had photographed the third and final one when he heard a voice behind him.

"Wouldn't you if you were married to Mrs. Roper?"

Grissom grinned. She was here.

"I don't even have to turn around. Sara Sidle"

"That's me!" She said, a huge grin on her face. When Grissom turned around she was more than he expected, she was even more beautiful than he remembered, and she no longer had long hair. It was shoulder length, and curly. She was wearing a pink tank top and black trousers, she also had sunglasses in her hand. "Still tossing simulation dummies? There are other ways to tell, you know"

Grissom smiled, "How? Computer simulation? No thanks, I'm a scientist, I like to see things. Newton dropped the apple, I drop dummies"

He still had that humor that not many people understood, he looked a lot different from what she could remember, his hair had greyed much more, he had a bigger build and a slightly larger belly, but to her, he was still perfect. In his own way.

"You're old school" She stated.

"Exactly. And this guy was pushed"

Sara suddenly remembered the nature of her visit. "How's the girl?" She asked sympathetically.

Grissom's grin slowly faded. "She's still in surgery, she's not doing well"

Sara nodded sadly. "That's too bad"

"God, Sara, I have so many unanswered 'why's'" Grissom had meant two different type's of 'why's' when he said that, he wondered if she knew.

"There's only one 'why' that matters now" But to both of them there were so many more, "Why did Warrick Brown leave that scene"

**A/N: Again, sorry if it is a little rusty, I should really not write the chapters as quick as I do...**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I'm not much in the writing mood, but I'm trying to get a few more chapters up before I go on holiday next friday, so again, sorry if the chapter is a little rough to read.**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter five

Catherine Willows hadn't liked Sara at first, she thought she was just another girl sneaking around, so her greeting had been anything _but _warm.

"Do you know where I can find Catherine Willows?" Sara had asked from the doorway, where Catherine was trying to trace a pager.

"She's out in the field" Catherine replied.

Sara looked at the peice of paper in her hand, she was sure that the woman at the desk had told her she was in this room.

Catherine looked up at Sara and sighed, clearly she didn't want Sara here. "Let me guess, Sara Sidle" She raised her eyebrows at her.

Sara walked nervously into the room. "I know who I am, I think you're a little confused" She tried to sound confident.

Cath hated people who were rude to her, she also hated people snooping around on her work. So at that minute, she couldn't stand Sara Sidle. "If you think you're taking my case... Forget it" She snapped.

Sara thought for a moment, "Look, we can stand here and argue... Or... We can get out there and find out who did this to Holly Gribbs" She studied Catherine's face for a moment. "Two sharp minds are better than one" She tried, hopefully making things better between them. That seemed to work, Catherine held up the pager and told her that it had been found at the scene and Sara stood with her while she tried to trace it. With no luck Sara headed for the door, after asking where she could find Warrick Brown, she needed answers from him.

"Oh" Catherine said, stopping her at the door. Sara turned around, "I'll page you with any information" Catherine told her. Sara smiled and left the room to find Warrick.

--

Sara had found Warrick at a Casino, like Catherine had told her. Sara didn't like Warrick, she thought of him as a slacker, thinking he had gone gambling while on duty, they were discussing why he had left.

"Do you know how many times I'd been left at a crime scene when I was a rookie?" Warrick said.

Sara looked at him for a moment. "Yeah, well this time is different"

"Yeah, why's that?" Warrick said sarcastically

"Holly Gribbs died on the operating table twenty minutes ago" Sara told him sadly.

Warrick stared at Sara in shock, as if he didn't already feel bad enough.

After a rough shift they had found the guy who killed Holly, and Grissom and Nick had finished their case too, Sara was sitting in her hotel room thinking, at the end of shift Grissom had told everyone to 'go home'. Sara didn't want to go home, she wanted to stay in Vegas.

After a lot of thinking Sara had came to a final decision, she was going to move to Vegas, but she would need to talk to Grissom first, so she decided to ring him.

_"Grissom"_

"Hey, Grissom? Its Sara"

_"Sara, Hi! You okay?"_

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Um, look, I was wondering, do you have anyone to replace Holly Gribbs yet?"

_"No, no, were you thinking of taking it?"_

"Well, if that would be possible, yeah, I really enjoyed working at the lab, and it was great seeing you again, but the working environment there is great, so yeah, I really would like to take the place"

_"Well, I don't see why not, I'll have to clear it with a few people, and you'll have to talk to your current supervisor, but in a few weeks time you should be working here, I'll call you to let you know how things are going"_

"Great! Thanks! Bye, Grissom"

_"Bye"_

**A/N: Sorry for the short chapter, but like I said, I'm not really in the writing mood, another chapter will be up tomorrow, or today, depending on where you are in the world :P**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Sorry if this chapter doesn't run smoothly, I found it hard to write since there isn't a timeline to run on for this. Oh, and for the beginning when they're on the phone, I'm 15, I don't know what happens when you want a job... So... Go easy on me if I got it wrong :P**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter six

Sara was sitting in her hotel room watching one of the few channels she had when her phone rang, she looked at the small screen. _'Grissom' _was the caller I.D., she smiled and opened her phone.

"Hey!" She answered with her casual, happy voice.

_"Hey Sara, its Grissom, I have news for you"_

"About the job?"

_"Yeah, you got it!"_

"Oh my god! I did?"

_"Yeah, you can start as soon as you have everything sorted out"_

"That's great! I'm gonna need to find an apartment that I can rent for cheap, and let my supervisor know that I've got the job, oh, am I on graveyard?"

_"Yeah, I told the lab director that you worked graveyard previously, so I'll be your supervisor"_

"Okay good, I'll phone you when I have everything sorted, thanks, Grissom"

_"No problem, bye Sara"_

"Bye"

Once they had hung up Sara immediately found her supervisor's, well, her old supervisor's, number and called him, telling him that she got the job, then she went to bed, she was going to be up early the next morning finding an apartment.

Grissom was sitting in his new office, wondering what it was going to be like once Sara worked with him, she didn't speak to him much while she was working the Holly Gribbs case, just when she first got there and a few times during her case, then when it was over, she had said, _'I'll see you soon'_ now he knew what she had meant. When he had first saw her at his seminar he knew that he had just witnessed true beauty, he thought that he _had _known the meaning of beauty with his previous relationships, the makeup, perfect features, perfect hair, but it wasn't that. Not to him, anyway. To him it was about the person inside, not about looking perfect, and he knew that: inside, Sara was a _very _beautiful person, and she was beautiful on the outside. He loved the way her hair curled in short locks, and the gleam in her eye when realisation came to her, and when she was laughing, the gap in her teeth, the sparkle in her eye. He sighed, it was sad, really; he loved her, and yet, he could never have her. It was an impossibility, their age difference, their position, he was her supervisor, she was his subordinate. They would both lose their jobs. Grissom was brought back from his thoughts when Catherine knocked on his door.

"Catherine" He greeted her.

"Hey" She said as she walked into his large office and sat down.

"How can I help you?" He asked her, eyeing her suspiciously; She never came to his office unless there was trouble on a case or trouble in her personal life, and her case had just been closed.

"I wanted to know if.. Sara... Sidle?" She said, wondering if she got her name right, Grissom nodded, "If she's going to be coming back again, I have to admit, I enjoyed working with her, I mean, we got off to a rocky start, but in the end, it turned out that she's a nice girl, I work well with her, and I hate being the only girl on the team, I mean, who can I share secrets with?!" She added, throwing her arms in the air.

"You came at the right time, Catherine" Grissom smiled, "She's going to be working here, as soon as she gets some things sorted out"

Catherine's eyes widened and she smiled, "Really? Great! I have to say, she's a _great _CSI"

Grissom smiled. '_Yes. She certainly is'._ He furrowed his brows slightly. "How come you never talk to anyone like this?"

Catherine looked at him, a confused expression on her face. "Like what?"

"Giving them compliments, lets say she was here now, you would never say any of this to her face"

"Oh. I don't know, I have to go, Nick's meeting me at the diner, wanna come?"

"No, I have paperwork to do"

Catherine looked on his 'paper-free' desk. "I don't see any paper" She said, then walked out, leaving Grissom alone in his office.

**A/N: Okay, I'm thinking I made Catherine a little OOC in this chapter...**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: I'm back! So I came back from my cruise last sunday, and here's the next chapter, excuse any mistakes that I might make, I'm still getting back into the drift of things...**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter seven

Sara was due to start work the next night, she had found an apartment close to the lab, and she had moved all of her things in. She spent a week looking around Las Vegas, getting to know the place, now she had everything ready for the next night, and she couldn't wait. Not for the work, no. She couldn't wait to see the man that had took her heart. Over, and over again. Every night, except sundays. But she could live with that, eventhough they had spoke reguraly, it wasn't enough. She needed to see him, speak to him. Touch him.

The next night didn't come quick enough, but eventually she was there, at his office.

Grissom heard a knock at his door, looking up he saw her, standing at his door. He smiled. "Sara, come in"

"Well, I'm here, when do I start?" Sara asked, grinning.

"Tonight, you, Nick, and me are working on a missing person"

Sara nodded.

"Right now, I got paperwork, so you and Nick are going to her house to collect evidence"

"Okay, where will I find Nick?"

"Try the locker room"

Sara nodded and walked out of his office.

Twenty minutes later Sara and Nick were on their way to the house, when they got there Sara walked into the house and inspected the security pad on the wall. "Get a picture of the security pad. Someone touches it before it's dusted, I break their fingers" She warned. She continued down the hall, the photographer following. "Shoot the mirror, point of disturbance, the lamp, point of disturbance" She placed evidence markers on the objects, then turned to look at the doorframe, Nick walked into the room and also looked at the doorframe.

Sara turned. "You're standing in my crime scene" She joked.

Nick held up a disk, "No, you're standing in mine" He smiled.

"You're doing audio? I wanted that" She said, jealousy in her voice.

"I outrank you" He said.

"Technicality. Who did Grissom handpick to work here?" Sara said, smiling.

"Keep telling yourself that" Nick said, laughing.

About two hours had passed and Nick was sitting in his car ready to take his stuff back to the lab when Grissom leaned through his window.

"Nick, tell the lab to do a reverse algorithm on that tape and then get it to enhancement"

Nick smiled, "I know what to tell the audio guy"

"You've been a Level 3 for what, two weeks?"

"I got it under control" He got no answer, just a stern look from Grissom, "I swear" He added.

Grissom smiled and moved away from the car.

"Later" Nick said.

Grissom walked into the house, the first thing he noticed was Sara taking pictures. She was truly beautiful to him. He looked around the room, trying to avoid looking at Sara.

"Cursory call - Looks like a proffesional job" Sara looked at Grissom, not getting a reply she continued, "Our guy bypasses the security system, surprises the wife in the back hall. Drags her in here. She grabs onto the doorway - sign of struggle. No sign of sexual assault. He's in, they're out" She looked over again, noticing something on the carpet that had caught his attention, "Probably... egress through those doors." She stopped and sighed slightly, "excuse me, is my evaluation interrupting you?"

She finally got his attention, "No, no, no. I barely heard you"

Sara smirked, "Glad I have a healthy ego, you find something interesting there?"

"Dirt"

Sara furrowed her brows slightly, "You're so... Technical... I can hardly keep up... But..."

"Oh, sorry, but, uh, out of context... it's just... dirt"

They continued to process the living room for a while then walked out onto the patio.

Sara sniffed up. "Did you just, slap on bad cologne?" She smirked slightly.

"I never wear it, interferes with the job"

"It's almost sweet"

Grissom noticed a cloth on the ground, he picked it up and smelt it, then offered it to Sara to smell.

"Can't be chloroform" She stated.

"Halothane, maybe"

"We'll confirm it in a GC mass spec" Sara said, going into her bag for an evidence bag.

Grissom smiled, ""Looks like a proffesional job," I think you said?"

Sara smiled and looked up at him. It melted his heart everytime she did that.

"Care to amend your evaluation? I mean, if the guy forgets the rag he used to knock her out, he can't be much of a pro." Grissom said as he put the cloth in the evidence bag she was holding open for him.

"I, uh... Keep trying to be your star pupil" She said, smiling.

His heart stopped. But he didn't let it show. "Sara, that was a seminar, this is real. Pebbles, tile - The front is all concrete"

"No dirt. Context-- There is dirt on the carpeting inside"

"In an otherwise spotless house" Grissom added.

"You're saying the kidnapper tracked the dirt in"

"Possible, as of now, that's all we have... So I guess we follow the dirt" Grissom walked back into the house, leaving Sara smiling and shaking her head.

After a lot of hard work, they found the missing girl, Sara was stood next to him, her head down, shaking it.

Grissom noticed, he put his hand on her face, sending shockwaves through both of them, Sara lifted her head.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Never ceases to amaze me what people do to eachother" She walked off, shouting instructions to people, Grissom sighed and told Brass that they had found the girl. Alive.

**A/N: SORRY! SORRY! SORRY! Again, I've been on holiday, been back over a month, I just started my final year in school, a LOT of hard work, so I won't be updating as often, but don't worry, I'll finish this... Eventually, just stick with me, send me hate mail, whatever you want! But this WILL get finished.. IT WILL! Okay, there's more to come about this episode, I would have done it all on one chapter but it would be reaaaaally long, and I really wanted to update for you guys, just so you know I am still alive and my ship didn't sink.. so... yeah.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Ergh... I hate school... Sooo, here's the second part of that chapter, I would have put them in one chapter but it would have been tooooo long, and get boring after a while because I have to follow the script for this episode, I felt like there was no other way to do it, by the way, if you guys want to know where I get the scripts from let me know in a review and I'll give you the link in a message :)  
**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter eight

Grissom had gone to visit Laura in hospital, he was interviewing her with her husband, Jack.

"So you never saw the person, huh?" He asked her.

"He... Grabbed me from behind" She replied in a nervous, shaky voice. "There was something clamped over my mouth... and thats the last thing I remember" She said, while touching her lips.

"You know how you got the bruising around your eye?"

Laura thought for a moment then shook her head, "I have no idea, I'm sorry. I was knocked out" She took a nervous, shaky breath, looking at her husband. "I just don't think I can help you"

"She's been through enough, can we cut this short?" Jack asked Grissom angrily.

Grissom smiled slightly, "Sure, I'd like to get a blood sample from you, though, if I could"

"What for?" She asked suddenly.

"You've got scratches on your arm, if we can find traces of your blood in Rundle's truck we can match the DNA - make our case against him that much stronger" He explained.

Jack sighed slightly, "Come on, Grissom, you have the guy, isn't that enough?"

"Yeah well, we didn't get any prints off the duct tape our audio guys are working on stuff. Right now we need something more concrete if we want to prove that he did it."

"I want to help, Jack" Laura told him firmly.

"Okay, all right" Jack sighed.

Laura looked Grissom in the eyes, a cold look that made him shiver slightly. "Whatever it takes to put this guy behind bars, I'll do."

Later on Grissom and Cathering were talking in the hallway when Sara appeared with a roll of duct tape.

"Hey Grissom, come tape me up" She asked smiling.

Grissom, slightly shocked, turned to Catherine, who had a look of shock on her face. "I love my work" He said, smirking.

"It shows" She replied.

Grissom had just taped Sara up, he looked at her, they both could feel the tension in the room building up. Sara wanted to jump up at him and pull him into her arms there and then. He looked at her, smiling, she smiled back. They both knew how special the moment was to them, how special the others smile was, but they just didn't know that they both felt it.

"So, you found Laura's hairs here... Passenger side, front seat?" Grissom asked.

"Right, not in the back, which made me ask, what kind of kidnapper puts a woman bound and unconcsious in the front seat? The back of my arm isn't touching the sheepskin, see?" She explained to him, while demonstrating.

Grissom, slightly confused, shook his head a little, "Yeah, so?"

"But..." Sara continued, smiling at herself. "... there is sheepskin fibre on the back of Laura's sleeve, that tells us Laura sat back like a normal person would" She held out her wrists to Grissom, who was now smiling at her, impressed with her work, would she ever _not _impress him?

"Cut me, Mack" She told him.

Grissom took the scissors and carefully cut the tape from her thin wrists, being careful not to harm her.

Sara continued with her explanation, "Like this" She then sat back on the seat, the back of her arms touching the sheepskin covers for the car seats.

"So she wasn't bound at all?"

"Correct. But, would a kidnapper risk putting an unconscious woman in the front seat of his car, even unbound? Answer is usually in the question -- you taught me that" She added, smiling, "So, was she unconscious? We found halothane on the patio. Halothane knocks you out ... if you take it."

"So, you're saying she never inhaled the halothane?"

"Proof would be in her blood, halothane stays in the system up to 48 hours" Sara said, sounding upset that she hadn't got a sample of her blood, Grissom smirked.

"How pleased am I that I got a sample of her blood?" He said, smugly, Sara sighed. "So you can go check at the lab, see how it turned out"

Sara stood up, smirking at him. "Damn it, I wanted to carry the ball over the line" She walked past him, leaving him with her scent.

"I know" He said, quietly.

--

After a lot of hard work, Grissom, Sara, and Nick had finally solved the case, Laura had been in on it all the time, she had thought they would be sharing the ransom money, but he didn't want to split it, he wanted to keep it all to himself, so Laura ended up buried alive, but they both ended up in jail.

--

Grissom was sitting in his office filling out paperwork about the case, he heard his door shut and looked up to find Sara standing against it.

"How did I do?" She asked, smiling.

"Huh?"

"My first official case as a CSI here"

"Oh, you did great, well done" He replied, grinning.

"Thanks, I was wondering if you wanted to get a coffee with me at the little cafe down the street from here?"

"I would but I have a lot of paperwork to do" He sighed, taking off his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Migraine?" She asked.

"Yeah, I get them a lot"

Sara walked over to his desk, sitting down in a chair. "You work too hard" She said, gently, rumaging around in her bag. "Here, try these" She handed him a packet of pills. "I used to get them, I carry them around just incase."

Grissom took the packet from her, smiling he put one in his mouth and took a drink of water. "Thanks"

"No problem, keep those, you need them more than I do" She said, getting up and walking back to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow"

"Bye, Sara" He said as she shut the door, realising that he would, infact, see her tomorrow, and almost every day from that day on.

**A/N: Sorry, I think that will be the end of following a script for a few chapters, so, tell me what you think! If I made any mistakes, blame them on the fact that I'm still getting used to my final year of school.... Ugh. I'll try and set a schedule for my updating dates... I repeat the word 'TRY'.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I just found the perfect site that I can use to find the GSR bits I need for this story :D So hopefully I'll update quicker and the story can flow better.**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter nine

Over the next few weeks Grissom and Sara got closer and closer, but Grissom noticed a change in her attitude, she was getting affected by cases more and more, letting them get personal to her, he knew he needed to do something about it. He made sure he put Sara with him on their next case, a woman found dead, wrapped in a blanket in the mountains.

He hadn't realised just how much the case affected her, until she had almost been in a fight with Scott, Kaye's husband.

"It 'got there' when you shot your wife in the head before you wrapped her in a blanket and you dumped her in the mountains!" Sara shouted, getting closer and closer to Scott's face, pointing her finger at him.

"Get your finger out of my face, bitch" He shot back at her, smacking her arm away.

Grissom watched helplessly as Sara lunged at Scott. "Sara!" He shouted, before grabbing her and pulling her against him.

"You touch me again, you draw back a stump!" Sara yelled.

"Look at her!" Scott shouted.

"Sara!" Grissom yelled again as she tried to get out of his grasp.

"Can't you control her?" Scott asked angrily.

"Get him outta here, Jim" Grissom told the older detective.

"I told you she was a handful!" Scott yelled as he was took away by Jim.

"You don't know a handful!" She yelled back.

Once Scott was gone Grissom turned her around, he looked her in the eyes, what he saw there shocked him, anger, hurt, and sadness, something had caused her to feel that way about certain cases.

"Hey, hey, what is the matter with you?" He asked, grasping her shoulders.

He could tell she was close to tears. "I am a woman, and I have a gun. Look how he treated me! I can only _imagine _how he treated his wife!" She took a shaky breath and walked away, leaving Grissom watching after her.

It was the next night and he had just arrived at work, he was making coffee when he noticed Sara asleep, her arms folded on the table infront of her, her head resting on them.

"Sara?" He asked as he picked the kettle up from the burner.

Sara woke up looking slightly confused.

"Sara, you okay?" He asked gently.

"Fine. Yeah" Grissom knew that when she said she was fine, she wasn't. He decided to leave that out of it.

"Did you sleep here?"

"I was working till 4:00am I combed every demo Scott's driven. Zilch. What's up?" She replied, tiredly.

"I need you to do some background for me on Warrick without letting him know why"

Sara looked at the table. "Oh, Warrick, your favourite CSI"

She was expecting him to deny that, but he didn't, "That's why I want you to handle it, so that Ecklie can't accuse me of favoritism if it turns out Warrick's clean"

Sara thought for a moment. "What do you want to know?"

Grissom had so many answers to that question, mainly about Sara.

"I want you to find out if he's been gambling on my time. Ecklie told me he had one of his guys sub for him in court, he told that guy it was an emergency, but Ecklie has it on good authority that Warrick was gambling at the Monaco"

"Alright, I'll see what I can do" Sara smiled at Grissom.

Later on that shift Grissom was sitting in his office eating a yoghurt. He heard footsteps and looked up to find Sara leaning against his doorway.

"Hey" She said.

"Did you find anything about Warrick?" He asked hopefully.

Sara shook her head slightly, "Um, I'm-I'm here about something else. You... You know how you say, "We're the victims last voice"?" Sara had remembered that from his Seminar.

"Mh-hm"

"I thought it was our job to speak for Kaye Shelton"

"You don't crunch evidence to fit a theory"

"What if you hear the victims screams? In the car, at the store"

"You have empathy for her, Sara. You want someone to pay for what was done to her. That's normal"

Sara knew what she was about to say was completely inappropriate, but she felt it was her last resort. "You wanna sleep with me?"

Grissom froze. _'Yes, I do' _He put his yogurt down and took off his glasses, "Did you just say what I think you said?"

"That way, when I wake up in a cold sweat under the blanket, you can tell me its nothing. Its just empathy" She turned and walked away, ready for another night of screams.

Grissom sat back in his chair, he had just missed his chance with Sara, he needed to find out why this case meant so much to her. He realised what he had to do to find out, he would have to take her offer on board.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: This is just something I wanted to slip in so its not all about them being at work.**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter ten

So there he was, standing at the front door of her apartment, trying to work out what he would say when she opened the door, it wasn't like he could say, "Oh hey, Sara, I was thinking about what you said earlier, and well... Yeah, I'll sleep with you, purely for professional reasons" He finally decided that what he would say would just come to him when she answered the door, so he lightly knocked on her door.

After a few seconds he heard locks being turned, then the door opened.

She opened the door to find him leaning against the wall opposite, "Grissom?"

"Sara, hi. Can I come in?"

"Uh... Sure"

He stood with his hands in his pockets in the middle of her living room.

"Not meaning to sound rude, but, why're you here?" Sara asked after closing her door.

Grissom sighed, "I want to know why this case has affected you so badly"

Sara looked at the floor, sitting down on a chair she sighed. "I... I can't can tell you why, Grissom"

"Why?" He asked gently, sitting down on the sofa next to her chair.

"Let's just say... My childhood wasn't the best, that's all I can tell you, when I'm ready, I'll tell you, that could be weeks, months, maybe years, but eventually, I will"

"I'm worried about you Sara, if you don't tell someone, enentually, you'll have a breakdown"

"I just can't tell anyone, sorry" She paused, looking at the floor, "You want anything to drink while you're here?"

"Um, no, don't bother, I need to be somewhere, I uh... I have a date" Sara was sure she heard regret in his voice as he told her that, but she couldn't help he heart dropping at the thought of him dating another woman.

"Oh, ok"

"I'll see you tomorrow" Grissom said as he got up.

"Uh, let me... Let me see you out"

Grissom smiled as they walked to her door.

"Nice apartment by the way"

Sara laughed, "It was all I could get on short notice close to the lab, it'll do for now"

"Good, good, well, I'll see you tomorrow"

"Bye, Grissom, hope your date goes well" _"No I don't, I hope it goes bad and you never see her again"_

"Thanks, have a nice night, Sara"

"Bye" She closed the door slowly.

**A/N: I don't know where I got this idea from, I just sort of.. write, and things come out of it, oh well... Hope you liked it!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: So... I didn't want to go to sleep, and this came into my head.**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter eleven

Grissom stood at the Chinese restaurant doors waiting for his date, they had been friends for over a year, since meeting her at his lecture he had always thought she was attractive, he wasn't sure if he wanted to have a serious relationship with her yet. Grissom thought about how different she was from Sara. This woman, Sheila, was an average height, red-headed, extremely skinny, and a very loud, woman, Sara, on the other hand, was tall, brunette, not to skinny, yet not fat either, and quite quiet, unless she was arguing. Everything about Sara attracted him to her, but, Sheila, he wasn't quite sure how he felt about her, she and Sara were complete opposites, and he knew that if Sara was ever to meet her, she would hate her immediately.

Just then Sheila pulled up in her flashy car, he smiled when he saw her. She was wearing a short, black dress, with a small, waist length, black leather jacket, her hair in a bun, and stilettos, of course, she had a lot of jewelery on.

"Sheila, you look as beautiful as ever" He said when she walked over to him. _"Not as beautiful as Sara"_

"Gil, not too bad yourself"

She linked her arm into his and they walked unto the posh restaurant, being a gentleman, he took her small leather jacket off her and put it on the back of her seat, before pulling it out for her.

"Thankyou"

A young waiter came over to their table, "Hello, sir, madam, welcome to our restaurant tonight, I'm Paul, your waiter, here are your menu's" He handed them both a large leather covered book, with about five pages inside, "May I take your drink orders?"

"Thankyou, I'll have champagne please" Sheila told the young man.

"Okay, and you, sir?" He said, scribbling down her order.

"I'll have the same please"

"Okay, I'll be right back with those"

"So," Sheila started once Paul had left, "I heard about one of your CSI's being shot"

"Yes, Holly, I knew she wouldn't be right for the job, still, it was horrible to see her die like that, she hadn't even finished her first shift. Warrick Brown, the person who was supposed to be shadowing her, he left the scene, thought there was an officer there, she was only taking prints when the suspect returned to the scene and shot her"

"Las Vegas, not a safe place to live" Sheila sighed.

Grissom nodded in agreement.

"So, what do you do now, Sheila?" Grissom leaned across the table slightly.

"Oh, I'm a police officer, I'm surprised I haven't ran into you at a scene yet"

Grissom smiled. "How long--" He was interrupted by the waiter with their drinks.

"Here are your drinks, are you ready to order yet?"

"Oh, yeah, I'll have the sweet and sour pork please" Grissom said, handing his menu to the waitor.

"And... I'll have... the same, thanks" She said, quickly scanning the menu, not finding anything that she felt like having she ordered the same as Grissom. "So, you were saying" She said , once Paul had scribbled down their orders and hurried off

"How long have you been a police officer?"

"Oh, not that long, about ten months now"

Their friendly conversation carried on for two long hours, when the time came to go home Sheila stopped him at his car.

"Gil" She said suddenly.

"Yes?"

"Its just... Well... I really enjoyed tonight, and... Well, I'd love to do it again sometime, you know, see where things go"

Grissom had hoped that she wouldn't say that. He didn't want to do it again, he had enjoyed it, but it hadn't felt right. He sighed, "I don't think that would be a good idea, Sheila"

"Why?" She shot back at him.

"I don't.... I don't feel the same way about you, as you do for me"

She inspected his face, she was a good reader of people. "There's someone else"

"Not... Exactly"

"But... You want there to be someone else" She said slowly.

He sighed. "Her name's Sara, she's just started working for me, I'm her supervisor, she's my subordinate. I first met her at my lecture in San Fransisco about three years ago, we kept in contact, phoning and emailing, when I first saw her I knew I was attracted to her but I didn't think it would get like this."

"By this, you mean you being madly in love with her and not being able to do anything about it?" She asked.

"Yeah"

"The only advice I can give you, is that, as a woman, I think you should just go for it, before you know it, it could be too late and you'll lose her to someone else" Sheila thought for a moment then a look of shock came over her face. "Wait, this girl, Sara, she was at your lecture in San Fransisco?"

Grissom nodded.

"The lecture I was at?"

He thought for a moment then nodded. "Yeah"

"Sara... Its not Sara... Sidle, is it?"

"Um... Yeah, it is, you know her?"

"Yeah, she was like... The smartest person I'd ever met in university"

Grissom smiled and chuckled, "She's possibly one of the smartest people I've had working for me"

Sheila looked around, as if making sure no one was around to hear what she was about to say, "Wanna know something about her that she thought nobody knew?"

He shrugged, "Sure" _"This should be interesting"_

"When she first started university, everyone thought she was weird, and one of my friends ended up sharing a room with her, and she told Sara that she would be out really late, when she came back, Sara was sitting in a corner with pictures infront of her, slitting her wrists and crying, my friend pretended she hadn't noticed, which was easy since they didn't get on anyway."

Grissom was shocked, Sara had told him that her childhood hadn't been normal, could that have something to do with it?

"I couldn't imagine Sara doing something like that" He said quietly.

"I guess you never really know a person, huh? I better get going, good luck with her, Gil, and keep in touch?"

He walked over to her car with her and opened the door for her, "Yeah, of course, bye, Sheila"

"See ya, Gil"

He waved, walking back to his car, as he drove home he couldn't help but think about Sara, slitting her wrists. What had happened to her as a child? She had obviously seen things that had haunted her for life. He needed to find out.

**A/N: So, can you imagine Sara slitting her wrists? I can't, but I thought it would fit the story of her childhood.**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: So I was kinda stuck for this chapter, didn't know whether to go back to the scripts or not...**

_**Hidden Emotions**_

Chapter twelve

As he drove home he wondered how Sara was holding up, he knew she probably got no sleep now because of the case, he also wondered if that story Sheila had told him was true, she could have been trying to put him off Sara. He sighed as he got to traffic lights, then he realised that he wasn't driving the right way to get to his house, he was driving to Sara's house.

"What am I doing?" He asked himself. He debated whether to drive the long way to his house or to call at Sara's to see how she was. He knew which was the better idea, but he also knew which one he would end up doing.

As he reached her apartment block he took a deep breath, he knew Sara would wonder why he had called at hers two times in one night, and she would ask him, he didn't know what he would say but he was sure he would think of something.

He got out of his car and slowly walked up the stairs to her door, he considered running back to his car and driving off, but instead knocked. A few seconds passed and he wondered if she was asleep, then he heard footsteps padding across the floor, and then the click of a lock.

She answered the door in sweat pants and a long t-shirt, presumebly what she slept in. "Grissom?"

"Hi"

"Um, hi" She shook her head smiling. "What are you doing here, twice in one night, what's up with you?"

"Well, since you spoke to me in my office earlier I've been worried about you"

Her eyes widened, "Um, Grissom, what I said, it was..." She blushed slightly, "Inapropriote,and... I, uh-"

He cut her off, smiling, "I know, Sara, I know what you meant by it, and I know you didn't mean for it to sound the way it did"

"Ok, thanks, glad thats out of the way, um, well, you're here, would you like to come in?"

He nodded. "Sara, really, are you ok?" he said as he sat down in the same place he had before.

"I've... Never, been... ok" She said it slowly, as if choosing the right words to say. "Oh, gosh, I'm sorry, I should have asked you this before, how was your date?" Sara didn't want to ask him, because she feared he would say it went great and he wanted to take it further, she had only asked to change the subject.

"Oh, it went ok, thankyou" He wondered whether to ask her about Sheila, but decided better of it.

"Um, do you mind me asking who it was with?"

He looked at her, maybe he would ask her, after all. "Sara, do you know a Sheila Daniels?"

She thought for a moment, her facial expression changed slowly. "Um... Yeah, yeah I do, is that who your date was with?"

"Yeah"

"Wait, how do you know she knew me?"

_"Quick, Grissom, think" _"She uh, she asked me if you worked for me, she remembered you from my lecture"

"Oh, okay"

Silence filled the room for a few long minutes, both wondering what to say next, both wishing the other would say something.

"Grissom--"

He cut her off before she could say anything else, "Sara, are you going to be okay when I leave?"

"I... Okay, look, I'll tell you the truth, I won't be ok, alright? I wish I could tell you why, but I can't, if I told you, you probably wouldn't want me working as a CSI"

"Sara, what can be that bad?" He sighed.

"The things I saw" Sara said it so quietly he had to read her lips.

"Sara--"

She cut him off, "Grissom, I think it'll be best if you leave and pretend we never had this conversation"

He had respect for her, and he hated to admit it, but he loved her, so he knew he had to do what she said, so he nodded, got up, and slowly walked to her door, with Sara behind him, almost in tears. He turned around unexpectedly, catching the first tear slowly falling down her cheek.

"Sara?" He said gently.

"Please, don't, just... Leave, please? I'll see you at work tonight"

"Okay" He nodded, walking down the stairs, Sara sighed and closed the door, sliding down it in tears, she hugged her knees and cried, cried until she ran out of energy and slept on her couch until her alarm told her to get up and go to work.

**A/N: Hmm.. sorry if this one was a little... rough... I was writing it at like... half 12 in the morning.**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Okay, okay, enough with the cheering, yes, yes... I'm back... Sorry for the wait... School got in the way... and then, well... I got writers block... The amount of times I opened a word document, started writing, then just sat and stared at my computer screen... Hmm... Well... On with the story!**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter fourteen

A few weeks later Sara and Grissom had forgotten about their ordeal, well, not exactly forgotten, but they had gotten over it, Grissom had given up on trying to find out what it was that had made her this way, and Sara had learned to deal with cases... Almost. She was just starting to get used to not letting emotions get in the way at work, then Grissom let his take over.

It was a case about a baby being murdered, Grissom had found the baby and let his emotions get in the way. He had just ordered Greg to work on his samples, not anyone elses, he was clearly effected by this case. He stormed out of the DNA lab and started walking down the hall.

Sara caught up with him, concerned.

"Grissom?"

He spun around angrily. "What?"

She suddenly understood how he felt, she hated it when people questioned her about being emotionally drawn to a case, so she decided better of shouting at him, instead she walked right up to him, inches away. "You told me a few weeks ago that nothing is personal, no victim should be special" She spoke in a soft, caring voice that touched his heart. He thought back, he remembered.

They had been sitting in his office, Sara was crying. They had just finished a case about a woman attacked and left to die, she ended up in hospital not expected to live. Sara had visited her regularly and the case effected her deeply. He had let her into his office so she could let it out, he had listened while she spoke.

_"The husband doesn't get it" Sara shook her head, wiping a tear from her eye._

_"He's so happy she's going to live. He doesn't realise she's going to be in a vegetative state for the rest of her life" Sara's voice broke as she started crying again. "And that kid, Thorpe... Is going to be out of juvie in 48 months, it's not fair" She whispered the end of her speech, unable to talk. She wiped her eyes as Grissom took a deep breath. He hated seeing her like this and sometimes wondered if she was able to do the job._

_Grissom hated to not be able to hug her and tell her it would be ok, he had to be professional, eventhough he knew it hurt her. "It's the system" He said, simply._

_Sara looked at him. "What kind of system rewards the suspect when the victim is too tough to die?" She said coldly._

_She knew he wouldn't be able to answer that. Sara got up and headed for the door, but Grissom spoke, stopping her._

_"Sara... you got to learn to let this go or you're going to spend all your time in hospitals trying to help the people you couldn't save" _

_"I wish I was like you, Grissom, I wish I didn't feel anything" She spoke slowly and sadly, another tear falling from her eye. She walked out of his office, closing the door behind her. So that was it... She thought he didn't feel anything, when he felt everything possible for her, love, anger, sadness, jealousy._

_He sighed. "Oh"_

"Everyone follows your lead" Sara spoke again, bringing him back to the present.

His anger boiled inside of him again, he didn't know why. "Everyone didn't find that baby, I did. And that little boy is dead because someone lost their temper or screwed up, or god knows what, so, excuse me, but this victim is special" He spat his last words, shocking Sara.

Another few weeks later and Sara and Grissom were working on a case about a serial killer, nicknamed the 'Strip Strangler' he stripped his victims and strangled them. All victims had dark hair, were quite tall and around mid thirties, Sara was just what he would be looking for and had volunteered herself to be 'bait.'

Grissom and agent Rick Culpepper were having a meeting about her offer.

"Okay. We have an operation in place. Your CSI, Sidle, has expressed an interest to my agents in availing herself. I wanted to let you know before we made the official offer" Culpepper explained.

"Really, what kind of operation?"

"All this talk about your great capacity for observation. Sara Sidle matches the victim prototype to a "T." She's a young woman, brunette, tall for a female."

Sara walked into the room and stood at the doorway, Grissom sensed her presence and turned around, their eyes met and Grissom quickly turned back to Culpepper. He realised what they wanted, and what could happen.

"You're not serious?" He said quickly. Worry and anger in his voice.

"And by all reports, she's steady. Has the right personality for a decoy operation." Culpepper continued, almost ignoring his comment.

"You're going to bait this guy with a human being? This is your big FBI plan" Grissom's voice was filling with anger everytime he spoke.

"Before he kills again, yes. Got a better idea?" Culpepper said, impatiently.

"Understanding him first, completely, so that we can get out ahead of him." He said it as if it was obvious, he couln't risk Sara's life, not now, that he had her with him and was starting to understand her.

Sara, herself, was getting impatient, she didn't know what Grissom was feeling and wanted to do it, wanted to get him off the streets.

"And if he kills again while we're trying to understand him?"

"Well I'm sorry, but he's not going to kill my CSI" _"I'm not going to let him take Sara away from me."_

Sara interrupted him. "I'm going to do it, Grissom"

At the sound of her voice, Grissom turned around, surprised.

"I want to" She added.

"You want to put yourself in the path of a psychotic killer?" He asked, almost pleading her not to do it.

"I'm trained in weaponless defence"

That surprised Grissom. But he didn't let it show. "Too bad, because that's what turns him on -- women fighting back. Gives him a greater sense of power when he makes his final kill."

"Grissom ... "

"Sit down, Sara"

Culpepper seemed interested in the way Sara and Grissom acted around each other, Grissom seemed almost... Protective of her. "Okay. If we're to follow your line of thinking, are you out ahead of him?"

"Not yet. He knows just enough about forensics to be dangerous. He thinks he's throwing us off track by planting confederate hairs. He probably shaves his head maybe his entire body as DNA protection. He may gag his victims using a garden-variety bath towel which he then takes with him as part of his murder kit. He will go after another tall brunette and the torture will be worse. But this time, he won't ejaculate. At least not at the scene." Grissom was deep in thought as he said this, thinking through everything he had seen at the scene.

"At home, later. He's learning control" Culpepper added.

"Think he knows his next victim?" Sara asked, almost fearing what she was going to do.

Grissom answered her without looking at her, he couldn't bear it. "Signature killers always know their next victim. But they don't know him"

Suddenly, he turned, looking her directly in the eyes, trying to show her what he felt. Sara stared him back, fear in her eyes. The way he looked at her made her want to close her eyes. But she didn't. "... Until he tortures, rapes and kills them." He continued.

**A/N: I'll be continuing it in another chapter... Tell me what you think (:**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: I'm still struggling a little with this story, I feel like I'm boring everyone by just going through shows, let me know if you have ideas or want me to try something new with this story, I don't want to make you all lose interest!**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter Fifteen

Later that night and their plan was just about to take place. Grissom had just reached the van which surveillance footage would be viewed by Culpepper a technician, and Grissom.

Sara was stepping out of the van as Grissom walked up to it. When he saw her he couldn't believe it, she was wearing a skirt, Sara Sidle was actually wearing a skirt, he had never seen her wearing one before and she looked great in it. She was wearing an orange tank top, a flowery orange and yellow skirt and sandals. He could have looked at her all day but he didn't have time, he wanted to stop their plan before it went too far and Sara ended up being a real victim.

"This is a pretty flimsy excuse to get your circus up and running, don't you think?" He said to Culpepper angrily.

"Lives are at stake, I'll take flimsy over nothing" He replied.

Grissom couldn't believe what he was hearing, yes, lives _were _at stake, and one of them was Sara's. "This is action for action's sake Culpepper. You're risking my CSI's life."

Culpepper walked away, Grissom was desperate, he wanted to tell Sara how he felt there and then. Sara walked up to Grissom, he was hoping she would back down from the plan, but had no such luck.

"Look, this is my idea. I want to do something before another girl gets killed and ..." She didn't get a chance to finish as he interrupted her.

"Listen to me, Sara. If we study his past, we can predict his future." He was almost pleading her to change her mind.

"You've been saying that for weeks. It's taking too long. Someone else is going to die and you're still going to be figuring it out."

He stared at her, she was right, their killer was moving too fast. He felt like he was actually seeing the real her for the first time, he knew she just wanted to catch him and realised he was being selfish; He wanted to stop her from being killed, and he knew that by doing that he would be letting someone else be murdered. He was about to say something when Culpepper shouted over.

"Okay, Sidle we're good to go."

She took a deep breath. "Wish me luck" She said, helplessly.

_"Good luck, I love you"_

He stared after her, Culpepper looked over, noticing the exchange between the two again, there was definitely some tension between them.

Grissom was angry, and stunned, he wanted to stop her, but he also wanted to let her go on too. He looked over to Brass who smiled at him slightly, there was something between Grissom and Sara, he didn't know what but he would find out. Eventually.

--

Grissom and Culpepper were sitting watching the surveillance. A man had just walked past Sara's isle twice.

"Whoa, that guy's coming back" Grissom said, as he watched the man walk past for the second time.

They watched as he approached Sara.

"Would you happen to have a cigarette?" He asked. He had a broad build, with black hair, and a face that looked innocent but evil at the same time.

"Um... Yeah, actually" Sara replied, smiling nervously. Grissom watched, just as nervous as her.

"Culpepper..." He said, warning him.

"Let her play" He replied.

"I've been trying to quit. Didn't want to buy a pack." The man said, watching, as Sara looked around in her bag for the packet.

"Me, too. This is my last pack ... but, uh, I say that every week, so ..." Grissom was surprised, he didn't know Sara smoked. She handed the pack of cigarettes and he took one out, she put the pack back in her bag.

"Non-filtered. The women I know smoke filtered-- you know those long, skinny cigarettes?" The man smiled.

"Guess it depends on the woman." She said, watching him carefully.

"Guess it does." He put the cigarette between his lips. "You got a light?"

"Sure. Yeah" She looked in her bag again, the man looked around him.

"You live round here?"

"Maybe."

Grissom watched, smiling. _"That's my girl"_

"I don't usually give out that kind of information"

"It's probably smart. I wouldn't tell me either." He smiled nervously and looked at her for a short while. "You're cute"

Sara gazed at him, for a second Grissom thought she was actually buying it. Well, he couldn't blame the guy for saying that, she was.

"Thanks"

The man looked to the side, Sara also looked, the man reached his hand into her bag. Grissom watched helplessly, while Culpepper alerted the officers.

--

"Alright, we're on the move. Lets go!" He shouted.

Grissom jumped out of the van with Culpepper and some officers following with their guns drawn.

--

"Hey!" Sara shouted at the man as the officers reached them.

"Don't move!" An officer shouted, the man took a step back and held up Sara's wallet.

"I'll give it back, here!" He dropped her wallet, an FBI Agent cuffed him. Grissom picked up Sara's wallet.

Culpeppers phone rang and he answered it. After he hung up he spoke. "I do not believe this is our man"

"What was your first clue?" Asked Grissom.

"Murder at the Monaco Hotel. Woman found bound in her room stripped and strangled."

Culpepper turned and left. Grissom looked at Sara.

"He met the profile" She sad sadly.

He handed Sara her wallet, then put his hand on her back as they walked out of the store.

"Sometimes the hardest thing, is to do nothing"

They both knew the double meaning of his words.

**A/N: Short-ish chapter, I know, I'll hopefully have another up tomorrow!**

"


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Yes, I know, sorry! A lot's been going on, coursework, christmas, and I couldn't be bothered to write for a while, I'm trying not to follow the scripts as much, but it's hard not to, so stick with me!**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter sixteen

It was a few months later, Grissom, Sara, and Warrick were working on a case that was proving hard to close: An apartment had been found covered in blood, the last person living it had claimed it was all his blood, from nosebleeds. They had gotten a sample of his blood, sprayed from his nose, and had compared it to a photo from the crime scene, it was the same.

"Oh great, our big murder's a nosebleed" Sara sighed.

"Oh, not necessarily" Greg said while walking into the room, he had a sheet of paper with test results from the lamp from the apartment. "Sample from nosebleed's lamp. It's not his blood. And I don't know who's blood it is, but the amelogin cam back with something pretty interesting. XX"

"Female blood" Warrick said.

"Mh-hmm"

"Our guys girlfriend is still missing" Sara said.

"Two things which may have nothing to do with each other" Grissom said, he hadn't intended to look at Sara as he said it, but he had.

"Or everything" She said, looking back at him. She walked out of the room with Warrick, leaving him thinking.

About half an hour later Grissom and Sara had returned to the apartment, looking for any evidence that their guy had committed a crime. They had been looking for about five minutes when they heard buzzing.

"How many flies do you count in this room?" Grissom asked.

Sara focused on the flies, trying her best to count them."Fifteen, give or take"

"I counted four on my first walk-through"

They both noticed mess around the room, mainly the refrigerator and wall.

"Fly spots. Regurgitations" Sara said.

Grissom grabbed a chair and stood on it near the wall, he tested the fly spot with his finger, it came off on his finger. "Fresh. Problem is, flies don't feast on dry blood"

"Place is sealed, and they don't spontaneously generate"

"So they're feeding on fresh blood, could be a rodent though, or bad garbage" Grissom suggested.

"Or it could be something higher up the food chain, like Allison Scott"

They started searching for the source.

"The preponderance of flies is in this room" Grissom said.

"They can egress a space less than .001 centimetres" Sara replied

They ended up back to back, both trying to control themselves, once again unaware of the others feelings. Sara spotted the source. "Behind you. Vent."

Grissom turned around, looking over Sara's shoulder, flies were swarming in the vent high up on the wall.

After a while, they had been searching more, Grissom had found a beetle that could break the case and was waiting for the results from Greg.

"Excuse me" Greg said.

"Yeah"

"Silphid beetle, test for presence of human DNA" Greg handed Grissom the test results, exhausted, and sat down on a chair across the desk.

"Is this definitive?" Grissom said, alarmed.

"Yes, sir"

He grabbed his jacket and hurried out of the office, he found Warrick and Sara in the locker room.

Sara looked at the door to find Grissom hurrying in.

"Did we get our warrant?"

"The beetle was full of human DNA, Brass got us a judge"

Warrick nodded and grabbed a big hammer, "Let's go knock down some walls"

Later on, they had began knocking down the walls in their crime scene, only to find Alison Scott alive when Brass turned up with her. They had decided to try next door, the vent the flies were in was shared.

They were standing in the managers apartment, which the vent was shared with.

"Scented candles, huh?" Grissom remarked

"Food went rotten wanted to cover up the smell" The manager, Stu Evens, shrugged it off as if it was nothing, he was clearly nervous.

"You've re-plastered this wall recently?" Sara asked, looking at the walls.

"I had rain damage, funnelled down, wrecked a five-foot area"

"Huh" Sara nodded.

Grissom began taking a framed picture down from the wall. "You wouldn't mind if I uh... Examined your vent, would you?"

At that moment Brass entered the apartment holding a warrant. "You don't have to ask his permission, I got a new warrant that covers his apartment" He looked at Stu, "Your wife being missing put it over. Funny you didn't mention that before." He handed Stu the warrant which he read whilst Grissom and Sara set up a small ladder to reach the vent.

"Did you know that your apartment shares heating ducts with the apartment next door?" Grissom asked.

"Yeah, me and Cliff were always fighting about the temperature. So what?"

Grissom looked back through the vent. "Sara?"

"Yeah?"

He got down from the ladder while Sara grabbed the hammer, they started ripping the wall down.

"Hold up, hold up, hold up" She stopped Grissom as he was about to knock more of it down. Sara reached into the wall and pulled out a blanket, a white one. "Alklyd. There's blood on it"

Stu stared horrified, he thought he had hidden it well. _"Damned CSI" _He thought

"And Dermastidae Masculatus" Grissom added.

"That's Latin for "You're hiding a dead body" Sara said simply.

Stu looked from one person to the other, not knowing what to say.

"What's the matter? Didn't you realise how bad a corpse can smell so you just decided to move it around the place?" Brass asked in his usual, sarcastic voice.

"You can tell us where the body is, or we can, uh... Tear your place apart piece by piece. Whichever"

"I have nothing to hide" Somehow he had managed to find his voice, and lie, again.

"Either way I know we'll find a corpse, personally, I prefer to have fun" Grissom replied. He was confident he was hiding something.

Stu shrugged and walked out of his apartment.

–

They had began knocking down the walls and so far, they had nothing. Warrick knocked on the section of wall he was about to tear down and found a hollow section. "I got a hollow section"

"Let's open it up!" Grissom and Sara walked over to where Warrick was.

Warrick cut into the wall, peeled it open. An ironing board fell from the wall, they all got a slight shock and Grissom's anger was getting higher by the second.

"Damn! Are we in the wrong apartment again?"

"I don't know, I don't mind being wrong, I just don't think I am this time" Trying to control his anger he took a deep breath. "Okay... Start on the floorboards, I'm going outside" He walked out of the apartment, Warrick and Sara watching him. Sara sighed and looked over to Warrick, who gave her a sympathetic smile.

"Go on, go and see how he is, I'll start on the floorboards without you" Warrick told her, knowing she cared for him.

Grissom was walking around the apartment complex, breathing heavily, he leaned against the wall and tried to control himself, Sara walked out of the apartment and over to him.

"You okay?" She asked softly.

"Ninety-five" He told her.

Sara had a look of confusion on her face, "Excuse me?"

"Normally my pulse rate is seventy, when it gets to ninety-five I realise how mad I am. I-I have ten people working around the clock on this thing." He was talking very fast, she could tell he was blaming himself for this.

"You're too hard on yourself" She told him, smiling slightly.

"No, no, I'm not mad at me, there's a body in there and that guy knows where it is!" He was almost shouting by now.

"What's your pulse at now?" She asked, smiling, she knew he had just let it all out.

He sighed and pulled his cap further down his head.

Sara thought for a moment. "You.. Want to take a walk around the block?" She asked.

Grissom sighed. "No"

That hit her, he had rejected her offer.

"Clear your head..." She tried again.

"I'm fine" She knew from her own experience that he wasn't, but she wasn't going to push it.

"Okay" She said gently. Before realising what she was doing she had her hand on his cheek, his eyes had been closed, but they shot open at her surprisingly intimate action, she rubbed it slightly, surprised at the softness of his skin. Their eyes met and so much was said in those few seconds. She reluctantly pulled her hand away and shrugged. "Chalk, from plaster"

"Oh" He rubbed the back of his hand on his cheek and looked at it. No plaster. He looked at her again and she looked away.

"Better go wash up" She said softly. They walked back inside.

–

Grissom was in the apartment bathroom about to wash his hands, he turned on the hot water and nothing came out. He furrowed his brows slightly and tried the cold water. It worked. He turned the water off and tried the hot again. Still nothing. He wondered if there was a possible connection.

"Hey Brass, when did 'The Shnoz' say he lost his hot water?" Grissom asked as he came out of the bathroom.

"He wasn't exact" Brass replied.

Grissom looked at Stu Evens. "You, uh, have no pressure for your hot water"

"I got a plumber coming on Saturday"

"Well, you know, my Uncle Herb was a plumber, I might be able to help. Where's your installation" _"Seriously, Uncle Herb?" _He thought to himself.

"In the basement, but really, I got a plumber coming".

When they reached the basement Grissom checked the filtration system, he knocked on it and it sounded full, which wasn't possible because they only ever had about eight inches of water in the bottom. He opened the tank and the smell hit them. Stu Evens wife was in the tank, covered in slyphid beetles.

"Not enough candles in the world" Brass sighed.

"She nagged me" Stu said, as if it was an acceptable reason.

Grissom turned to look at Stu, he couldn't believe what he had just heard. "She _nagged _you?"

–

A few hours later Grissom was sitting on his sofa, the TV was on but he wasn't taking any notice of it. He was thinking about Sara, the way she touched him, the way the heat from that touch flew through his body. He had to stop thinking about her like that, he was her supervisor, he was fourteen years older than her, she would never want to love someone like him. Even though all he saw in her eyes during that one moment was love and affection. He sighed. He had to do something about it.

**A/N: Okay, let me know what you think, I'll try to write more without the scripts, unless you guys want me to continue writing the way I am, so let me know! I'll try and get back on track with this but like I said, a lot's been going on lately.**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: I know I'm terrible! I keep saying I'll try and update soon, and never do, and I'm **_**very **_**sorry for that, so hopefully this chapter will make up for it. I've decided to leave the script for a chapter or two and try and do my own thing, let me know what you think! **

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter seventeen

Weeks went by, and they didn't get any closer, he had wanted to do something about his feelings but two things were getting in the way: He couldn't bring himself to do it, and he knew that he, no... They, would be in deep water if they did have a relationship. He was too attached to his job, he loved his job. But he also loved her. Didn't he? Yeah, he did.

Sitting in his office he smiled to himself, yes, he did love her, he was sure of it, if he loved her, why shouldn't he tell her? He had always told himself that if two people loved each other, they shouldn't let anything get in the way. Then again, she didn't love him, did she? Well, she hadn't shown any love towards him, yeah she had touched his cheek, but that was only because she was wiping chalk from his face. Well, that's what _she _had told _him_. He sighed; so many things were going around in his head he didn't know what to make of anything. Pinching the bridge of his nose he closed his eyes and sat back in his chair. Hearing someone sit down in the chair opposite him he opened his eyes.

"What's bothering you?"

"Jim... Why would something be bothering me?" He knew his voice gave away the fact that something, was indeed bothering him.

"Come on Gil, how long have we known each other?"

He nodded, looking down at his desk, and sighed.

"I know that look; you had the same one six years ago when you came back from your seminar, in San Francisco. You didn't know whether to call a certain girl or not." Jim chuckled. "Who would've thought that Gil Grissom, forensic entomologist, workaholic, and a baseball fanatic, would come back from a seminar crazy about a girl?"

Grissom sighed hopelessly. "What do I do, Jim?"

Jim gave him a sympathetic look. "Well, from my own experience, if you don't tell her soon, she'll move on. How long you have depends on the girl, and I know that this girl won't give up on you easily."

He realised what Jim had said, _she _won't give up on _him_? "Wait, what do you mean, she won't give up on me?"

He chuckled again. "You don't know? Gil, she's mad about you, everybody around here knows. You are one blind man." Jim sighed, and leaned towards him. "We both know what trouble you'll get in if anything comes out of this, and if anything _does_ come out of it, you know my mouth will be kept shut." He winked at the still confused man and left him to think.

**A/N: Okay, yeah, short chapter, but I hope to update again tonight... Or, today... Wherever you are :P Anyway, let me know what you thought!**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: I didn't really know what to do with this chapter, so I hope you guys like it!**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter eighteen

He now knew that he was going to have to somehow let her know that he was attracted to her. It didn't matter if she knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her or not, he just needed her to know that she had to wait for him. Wait for him to come to terms with his feelings, wait for him to get the courage to risk his job for her, wait for him to say those three small words to her.

His first move, well, his first move didn't go as planned. Well, it wasn't planned at all. He was reading what felt like a suicide note. It was a request for a leave of absence from her. She came into his office, probably to see if he had read it.

"What's this?" He asked her, which he knew was, well, stupid, because he knew damn well what it was.

"It's uh; it's... Just what it says it is; a request for a leave of absence. Six months... A year, maybe"

What was she talking about? He couldn't go six months, possibly a year without seeing her.

"Why?"

"I was thinking of checking out the federal government system - FBI ..."

He snorted. He knew he shouldn't have.

"We have the best lab in the country" _'Way to go, dumbass, great way to convince her to stay.'_

"I need a different work environment"

"What does that mean?" He knew he was sounding harsh. He didn't mean to. If only he could say that to her.

"One with... Um, communication. Respect"

"Everyone here respects you"

"You don't" She said it looking him directly in the eye. She thought he didn't respect her?

He didn't know what to say.

"Is this about that hamburger thing?"

"No, Grissom ... this is not about that "Hamburger" thing. I don't believe you. How can you reduce everything that I've said to some kind of single quirk? Do you think the problem here is just about me?"

No. He knew it wasn't

Not getting any reply she carried on.

"If you don't sign my leave, I'm gonna have to leave" She turned around and started to leave. He felt like she was leaving his life forever. He had to stop her. He knew this was his chance, he had to tell her he needed her.

"Hey, Sara?"

She turned around.

He took a breath. Why was it so hard for him to do this?

"The lab needs you here." _'You've done it again. Is everything that comes out of your mouth about your job?"_

"Great" She smiled. Bitterly.

His second move was made under the influence of Catherine. They were at his townhouse for a meal, nothing romantic, they had been friends for years and they actually had meals at his house quite often. This one, though, she had planned, every time she planned something it was because she had something to discuss. This time it was about him and Sara. Chopping vegetables she brought it up.

"I heard about you and... Uh, Sara" She said it carefully; she could sense how tense he was about it.

He didn't want to talk about it.

"Sara, you know, she gets very... Emotional"

Catherine couldn't believe him, he always tried to avoid deep, heart to heart conversations.

"Are you in denial? No, that's ... no, no ... way too analytical. Wow, you got burned bad, huh? Welcome to the club. I got third-degree burns from my marriage. Happens to everybody. Everybody just moves on."

"Good. Let's move on"

She wasn't going to budge that easily.

"But you have to deal with it. You have to deal with it first. You got to deal with it before it goes away. You are the supervisor. You have responsibilities, and people are making a family around you whether you like it not, whether you give them permission or not. We don't have to go to the Grand Tetons together; just ... every now and then you got to lift your head up out of that microscope."

He had to admit; he knew what she was getting at. He knew he had to do something to stop her from taking this leave of absence.

He nodded.

"Yeah" He knew what he was going to do. He grabbed his phone book and flicked through it while Catherine moved into the living room where she sat with her wine, looking out of the window. He found the number he was looking for and dialled it.

"Yeah... I-I-I'd like to get some flowers for a girl, no, no, not flowers. A plant, a living plant, she likes vegetation... Yeah, that'd be fine. To a Sara Sidle. . Deliver it at the CSI division, Las Vegas Police Department the one out on North Trop Boulevard. Yeah, you can bill me at the same place. Gil Grissom." There was a pause. He was thinking. "The sentiment? Oh, oh, on the card. Yeah, um, uh, have it say... Have it say, uh... From Grissom" He smiled, satisfied. Hoping it would make her stay.

His last move was made when they were working on a case about a dead ice hockey player. They were sitting on the stands next to each other discussing the case.

"Two minutes for elbowing, four minutes for high sticking, ten minutes, un-sportsman-like conduct." Grissom said, not exactly talking to Sara, but speaking his thoughts. It was a habit he had, that he didn't really notice often.

"Boys will be boys" Sara said, looking out onto the ice.

"Yeah, sounds like these boys went to a fight and a hockey game broke out"

"You just don't like sports"

"That's not true; I've been a baseball fan my whole life" He said, quite proudly.

"Baseball, well that figures- All those stats." There was a hint of surprise in her voice, she couldn't imagine Grissom sitting in front of a TV watching something non-bug related.

"It's a beautiful game."

"Since when are you interested in beauty?"

He saw his chance. He took it.

"Since I met you"

She looked at him. Did he just say that? She carried on staring at him as he went on to tell her what they should do at the scene, she was so surprised she couldn't get up from her seat for at least another minute after he was a safe distance from her.

Sara knew he was trying to get something through to her, the past two weeks he had been strangely nice to her. She couldn't explain his reason for wanting her to stay, or why he had said what he had on their last case, but she had to admit, the plant had made her smile, and made her stay, she just wished she knew how he felt about her. It would put her mind at rest.

**A/N: I think this chapter turned out alright, but let me know what you think, and please give me some ideas, I don't just want to follow the script, and I want to know what you guys would like to see happen.**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Okay, hopefully you are all still reading along, just so you guys know, it's been half term and I'm back at school tomorrow. I'll still try and update but I might not be able to update as often as I hope to.**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter nineteen

It seemed like Grissom and Sara were getting along well, the others noticed that the tension between them was gone, which was great. Things seemed to be going great and everyone was happy, the team even started having breakfast together again, which they had stopped about a month before, well, Sara and Grissom had stopped going along, Catherine, Warrick, and Nick still went to the diner.

Things couldn't be going better at the lab, but there was one thing Grissom still had to find out. Sara was dating a paramedic, Hank Peddigrew. When he did find out, it was clear he wasn't happy about it. He found out when he overheard a conversation in the break room between Warrick and Nick.

"So, you heard about Sara and this paramedic guy?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, I never knew Sara was the type to date, she always seemed so... Alone, independent, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah."

Grissom had been walking past, but when he heard about Sara he stopped in his tracks, even though his hearing wasn't great, he had managed to overhear.

"What's this about Sara dating?" Grissom asked, it was his job to take care of his team, after all.

"Oh... Uh, I think you better talk to Sara about it, boss." Warrick told him, he knew Sara wouldn't be happy if she found out they had ratted her out.

Sara was about to go to court, about a case she solved, she stopped by Grissom's office, like she normally did when she was leaving the lab.

He smiled when he saw her. "You look nice"

"Thanks" She took a breath. She never liked going to court. "Wish me luck" She turned to leave but Grissom stopped her.

"Sara?" She turned back around to face him.

This was his chance.

"Whatever happens in court, it's not because you're seeing this... Guy" He knew the fact that he was unhappy about it was evident in his voice.

Sara didn't say anything.

"You... deserve to have a life" He finished off.

Days went by and he didn't hear anything about them breaking up, he knew he should be happy for her, but he couldn't be. He wondered just how long they had been together.

He knew she was with him when he paged her and she didn't come, well, she came, but not for another half hour. They had finished up and he was sitting in his office when she came by.

"I'm uh... Sorry I missed your page" She told him.

He looked up, disappointment on his face.

"It's just, um... You tell me to get a life and then I get one, and then you expect me to be there at a moment's notice. It's uh... Confusing"

He looked at his desk, shocked. She was right, he had to admit. Last year he had told her to get a life, and at least she had done what he advised her. But not the way he wanted her to. He looked up and she was gone. Probably going to cuddle up on the sofa with... _Hank_.

He had to do something before it was too late. He didn't know what, but it had to be done. He knew that Jim had been right, it was too late, and she had moved on.


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: See, I'm keeping my promise this time :) This chapter and maybe the next, depending on how far I go with this chapter, will focus around Sara and Hank, and Grissom's jealousy.**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter twenty

Sara got back to her apartment with an hour to spare before Hank would take her out to the meal he had promised her, they had to keep putting it off because they both kept getting called in to work. That was one good thing about their relationship; they both understood each other's problems with work.  
She went in the shower, dried her hair, applied some light makeup- She never wore heavy makeup, she was always told she didn't need makeup anyway. She put her hair up in a bun with a few strands of hair framing her face. She smiled at her reflection- She cleaned up good. Sara then looked in her wardrobe for a good outfit, she didn't have many 'going out' clothes, she never needed them, so she picked out a skirt that went to just above her knees, and was tight enough to show that she had a figure, and a nice blouse that she usually wore for court. When she was done she touched up her makeup a bit, grabbed her purse and paced the small apartment waiting for Hank. They were going out quite early for a meal; it was only 5 in the afternoon, but they both knew it would be best to go out at this time because there was a risk of being seen at night.

Finally there was a knock at the door, she left it for a few seconds- it would seem she had been waiting- and then opened the door to a very smart looking Hank. She smiled and linked her arm through his as they walked to his car.

When they were seated in the restaurant Sara started the conversation, while they were looking through the menu.

"Nice place you picked out, huh?" She smiled.

"Yeah, I figured we'd go somewhere nice since we always have to cancel, besides, this is a special day."

She was confused. "It is?"

Hank chuckled. "Yeah, it is, it's been one month since you accepted my invitation to take you out, and we've finally gotten to do it"

"Oh, right! Yeah, well at least we got to go out to lunch a few times"

Hank smiled. "So, are you having the beef lasagne? I heard you like pasta"

Sara looked at him, she was sure she had told him she was vegetarian.

"Um, no, actually, I'm vegetarian... I thought you knew that"

"Oh, oh! Right, yeah, you probably have, I can be very forgetful, sorry"

"Um, it's fine, really" _'Grissom remembered.'_

"Good, are you ready to..." Hank looked out of the window. "Crap!"

"What?"

"Um, Sara, could you excuse me a minute? I gotta go to the toilet"

"Okay... Sure" She looked out of the window, trying to work out why he made a dash like that, seeing nothing but a group of people coming into the restaurant she sighed and sipped her drink.

A long, fifteen minutes later he returned, but told her that he had a call from work, he had to leave.

"Is that okay? I'm really sorry, Sara, I know this keeps happening"

"No, no, it's fine, we'll just try again some other time, huh?" She laughed, but it was a fake one.

"Yeah, thanks for understanding" He leaned over and pecked her on the lips. "I hope you enjoy your seminar tomorrow"

"I will, thanks, Hank"

He turned around, and started heading for the door but stopped and walked back towards her.

"Could I at least drive you home?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, it's the least I can do, and I'm sure they won't mind me being a few minutes late"

"Well, okay, if it's no bother"

He smiled as they walked out the door.

**A/N: Again, sorry for the short chapters, I just end them when I feel like they are enough, I'll update again today/tonight though, promise! Let me know what you think!**


	21. Chapter 21

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter Twenty One

Sitting on her seat, fourth row up, she had her notepad in hand tapping her pen against it, waiting for the seminar to start. This all felt too familiar to her, bringing a smile to her face. The lecturer entered the room and she relaxed herself as she saw it was a middle aged woman, she probably would have left if the lecturer was in any resemblance to Grissom.

About half an hour into the seminar she cursed quietly as her pager went off, mumbling sorry to the people either side of her she checked it. "You gotta be kidding me" She mumbled. She stood up, trying not to draw attention to herself and hurried out of the hall, pulling her cell phone out of her pocket she called Grissom.

"_Grissom" _

"Griss, are you joking with me here?"

"_Look, I'm short on staff; I need you to come here"_

"Fine." She huffed and hung up. She walked to her car and drove to her apartment, changing into more work-suitable clothes then drove to the crime scene.

Putting on her sunglasses she walked towards Grissom.

"You know you pulled me away from a forensic anthropology seminar, right? It's required. It's part of the continuing education program." She was clearly angry with him.

"Well, I'm sorry, but everyone seems to have something to do today. I have a teenager who was run over by a taxi. He wasn't hit by it; that's not what killed him. He was stabbed, fatally. For now, I have no ID, no suspects and no primary crime scene." Looking at her he added, "I need you."

Sara smiled.

"How can I help?"

He smiled and held up the tape for her.

Once again things were getting better between them, but it still bothered him that she was dating this... Hank guy, what did he have that he didn't? Hell, who was he kidding? Hank was young, well built, and he wasn't risking his job for her. Grissom, well, he was the complete opposite.

A few weeks later, though, a case changed everything for him. They were investigating a case where a woman had driven her car right into a restaurant.

Catherine, Grissom, and Sara were at the crime scene, so was Hank.

Sara had just noticed Hank and Catherine and Grissom were watching the two.

Catherine leaned over to Grissom, "That's Sara's boyfriend" She said, as if rubbing it in. It felt like she was rubbing salt into one of his wounds.

"Hey Sara, typical Thursday" He said.

"Hank? Your wrist is broken" She said, looking at his injury.

Grissom could have cried. He saw how much care she had for that man.

A few minutes later everyone was working, Sara walked over to Hank where someone was attending his broken wrist.

"Mind if I take over?" Sara asked the man.

"No, go ahead" He told her.

Sara knelt down in front of Hank, gently wrapping his wrist in bandage. Grissom looked over, his jaw tensed. It bothered him seeing her caring for him.

"You okay?" She asked him.

"Yeah, I didn't think I'd see you tonight."

Sara smiled. "So that's what this is about"

"Thanks" He said as she finished up.

"Any time"

"Listen, I got to head over to the hospital, and I'm sure you got to get back to work."

"Yeah, but ... will you call me if you need anything? My cell will be on. Anything." Grissom hated that he could hear her saying those words. He wanted to be in Hanks place.

Later on Sara was at the hospital when she noticed Hank. She walked over to him smiling.

"Hey"

"Hey"

"'And the EMT of the year award goes to...'" She joked.

"Not me; death tolls now four... Could climb to four. Elaine- The girl in the wheelchair- she's one of the lucky ones."

"You were amazing"

"Eight years in the rig, first time I've actually been a part of the scene. I can't stop it going through my head."

"You never know when your life's going to change"

"Listen I- I gotta get out of here" He seemed nervous, why?

He moved to get past Sara but she grabbed his hand, stopping him.

"You need a lift?"

"No, I drove"

He turned to leave again but she stopped him.

"Hank? I'm really glad you're okay"

He smiled "Thanks"

He walked away, leaving her watching him, wondering why he had seemed in a rush to leave.

Later that day, Sara and Catherine were looking at photos from the scene.

"Who's Elaine Alcott?" Catherine asked Sara.

"Who?"

"Oh, well, she was seated with Hank. I just thought maybe that..."

"Oh" Sara knew that information was slowly mounting up.

"Anyway, um ... apparently, she told P.D. that she was returning from the ladies' room at the time of the impact."

"They must be friends, I saw him with her at the hospital"

"Okay" Catherine knew there was something more.

Not long later they were going through everyone that was in the restaurant, trying to find out of there was any particular target for the car crashing into the restaurant.

"Okay... Top to bottom, Cameron Black, deceased; from Jersey. First time in Vegas. Unlikely mark." Catherine started.

"Second table: Rachel Krandall, and ... Tom Krandall. Both died at the scene. Both worked for Sillmont Healthcare."

"Table three: Hank, and... Elaine Alcott, also works at the insurance company."

"Three out of five of the people sitting in the window work at Sillmont Healthcare. Maybe I should go talk to her." Sara said.

Catherine nodded. "Yeah. Maybe you should" She knew what Sara would find out.

At Elaine's Sara interviewed her, not long into their conversation she noticed a picture of Elaine and Hank. She picked it up.

Elaine noticed and smiled. "My boyfriend. Saved up my miles and took him to Hawaii last year. He's going to take me to Tahiti in a few weeks. I can't wait."

Sara put the picture down. She was shocked. She couldn't say that she didn't see it coming, though. Everything made sense now, it was why he had rushed to leave the hospital, she was there. It was why he ended their date early a few weeks ago, Sara remembered her from being one of the woman in the car park of the restaurant.

The next day they had interviewed Elaine, and Sara walked out of the room to find Hank waiting for her.

"I'll meet you at the car" Sara told Catherine.

"I called the lab, they said you were here." He swallowed nervously. "I heard you met Elaine."

"Yeah, she's really something" She paused, sighing. "I didn't tell her about us, by the way, if that's what you're wondering."

"I'm really sorry Sara"

She nodded sadly. "Yeah, me too"

"I don't know what else to say"

"I'll see you around" She said sadly, and walked away.

When she got into the car Catherine asked if she had plans.

"Nope"

"You want to go get a beer?"

Sara smiled, she knew Catherine had been there, done that, and got the T-Shirt.

"Drive"

**A/N: There you go, a longer chapter, and Grissom will be happy! **


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: I have been looking forward to doing this chapter, I don't know why! Ha-ha, hope you like it!**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter Twenty Two

They arrived at the diner, Sara hadn't spoke the entire journey, but Catherine knew better than to push her to talk about it. She had been through it. When they got the diner Catherine simply sat Sara down at a table, got the drinks and they sat in silence.

Sara finally spoke, "I thought he really loved me."

"Sara, if he did that to you, he isn't worth it."

"I hope he isn't doing the same thing with that poor Elaine"

"Uh... What happened... At Elaine's?"

"We talked about the case, I asked her a few questions, and then I saw a photo of her and Hank on the table"

"Did you tell her that you were with him?"

"No, I asked her who it was, she said it was her boyfriend, he's taking her on holiday in a few weeks"

"Oh, god"

They sat in silence again; Sara got up and walked away. Catherine knew she had gone to the toilets but didn't bother following her. She needed to be alone.

Fifteen minutes later Sara was still in the toilets and Catherine had finished her drink, she sighed, and checked her watch. 1:13 Am. She walked into the toilets and saw one cubicle locked.

"Sara?"

She heard a sniffle, a mumbled "just a minute" and the sound of her getting up from the toilet.

"Sara, you okay?"

Another sniff. "Yeah, I'm fine"

"Hank isn't work crying about, he's the one at loss here"

The door unlocked and Sara walked out, it was clear she had been crying.

"You're right" She said. "I don't know why I cried over him."

"That's more like it" Catherine smiled. "Besides, I know someone who is worth you way more than that backstabber"

"Who's that?" Sara said, while cleaning her face up.

"Oh, we both have a good idea of who I'm talking about" Catherine smiled. "I'll see you at the car"

Sara had a confused look on her face while she watched Catherine exit the toilets.

Grissom was sitting in his office, doing a crossword puzzle. It was the next day and Sara wasn't feeling any better. Catherine noticed this and went to Grissom's office.

He heard a knock. "Come in"

"Hey, Grissom, I need to talk to you about Sara"

Those words made his head snap up. He put his puzzle down and took his glasses off. Catherine knew this was 'I'm interested, keep speaking' look. "What about Sara?"

She sat down opposite him.

"She broke up with Hank yesterday"

"She did?" Now he was very interested.

"Yeah, on the case yesterday, she found out he had been cheating on her"

"Oh... Who with?" _'How could anyone cheat on _my _Sara?'_

"She was actually involved in the case, Elaine Alcott; he's taking her on holiday in a few weeks"

Grissom nodded his head sympathetically.

"Anyway, I thought I'd let you know, just go easy on her today, and like I said, Griss, get your head out of that damn microscope"

He nodded. That was one less thing to worry about. But he still had his hearing to sort out, it had been getting worse day by day, he knew his mother had the same problem which had led to her going deaf, but he could get an operation to sort it out. He didn't want an operation, but he did want his hearing. It was his only option.


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Yeah I know, it's been a while, well, a few days. Going back to school was painful... **

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter Twenty Three

He didn't know what to think of the situation, was it good, or bad? He sighed, running his hands over his face. He knew that to him it was a good thing, but he would have to find out whether Sara was happy about it or not. He grabbed the assignments and walked to the break room.

Sara was sitting staring into her cup of coffee, with Catherine next to her and Nick and Warrick opposite. He cleared his throat, letting them know he was there. Everyone looked towards the door and smiled tiredly.

"Okay, Warrick, Cath, double murder on the strip."

"Okay, come on War'" Catherine grabbed the slip, turned and smiled at Sara, and walked out of the break room, Warrick behind her.

"Nick, you're solo" He handed him the slip.

"Ooh, de-comp. Great" He mumbled walking away.

"Sara, you're with me, murder in a house not far from here"

She sighed and walked out ahead of him but he stopped her in the locker room.

"Sara, I heard about you and... Hank" He hated saying his name, never mind saying it in front of Sara.

"Oh" Was her reply; it was all she could manage to say.

"Are you going to be okay working?"

"I'll be fine, really. I don't need him, anyway"

"Okay, if you need anything, anything at all, just let me know, okay?" He smiled sympathetically at her. He didn't know he was that good at acting.

"Sure, thanks" _'If only I could tell you want I need. You'_

"I'll see you at the car" He walked out.

The case was pretty much an open and close one, they had worked in silence, barely speaking, and Sara now sat in the break room reading the newspaper. Grissom walked in to get some coffee and saw her.

"Sara, why aren't you at home?"

She didn't reply.

"Sara?"

This time she looked up, she seemed confused. "Huh? Oh, right, Grissom."

"Yes... I said: why aren't you at home?"

"Oh, I have nothing to do" _'And I don't want to be alone'_

"You have nothing to do here, either"

She didn't reply, she just went back to reading her paper.

"Go get some sleep, Sara" He sighed.

"Not tired" She mumbled.

He sighed again, she could be very stubborn. "Want to go grab something to eat at the diner?"

She looked at him, he never went out with the guys, yet, he was asking her to go with him now.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I'm starving, you must be hungry too"

"Um... Okay, I just need to get my bag"

"Sure, I'll see you at the car"

She walked out of the break room and he smiled, grabbing the paper and looking for the crossword.

A few minutes later they were driving to the diner, in silence, but it wasn't awkward, it was quite nice actually, giving them both time to think. When they got to the diner Grissom put his hand on the small of her back protectively, his touch shocked her, and sent shivers down her spine.

They sat down where they normally sat when everyone went for something to eat, they ordered and neither said much, he would let her say something first.

"Thanks" Was what she said.

"What?" What was she thanking him for? He tried to think back, but nothing came to mind.

"For... For everything, for this, for being there for me, for giving me this job, just... For everything, thanks"

"Um... You're welcome"

Silence fell upon them again, he saw her every day, spoke to her every day, but when it came to being alone, completely alone, with no one familiar nearby, he couldn't think of anything to talk about, they were always talking about cases, about something work related.

Their food came; Sara had a veggie burger, Grissom a cheeseburger, that was something Sara always wondered: what Grissom ate when he was out. It brought a smile to her face to know that he ate _some _things that, well... That normal people ate.

"What're you smiling about?" He asked her, grinning.

"Oh... Um, nothing" She tried to hide her smile.

"Sara, nothing, is always something" He said, an eyebrow raised, telling her that he knew she was hiding something.

"Um, it's just kind of... Comforting, to know you eat normal stuff.

"Normal stuff? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, you always eat bugs... Covered in something like chocolate"

"What, so that's not normal to you?"

She shook her head, taking a bite from her burger.

"Sara Sidle I am going to get you for that one day" He smiled, slyly.

She laughed, out of all the people she knew, Grissom was the one curing her pain that she hid so well. "No you won't"

"I will" He argued back.

"Wont"

"Just you wait"

"Oh I'll wait"

**A/N: Finally! Another chapter up!**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: I would like to thank Moochiecat for her reviews :D They made me smile :P Anyway, I'm not sure what I want to do with this chapter, hopefully it'll turn out okay **

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter twenty four

Grissom had noticed recently that his hearing was getting worse, he was having trouble understanding what people were saying to him and sometimes he couldn't hear them at all. He knew he had to make an appointment to get an operation that would fix it. He hated to admit it, but operations were one of the things he feared most.

He was sitting in his office thinking, he had just made the call to the hospital, is operation was next Tuesday, and he was scared like hell.

A few days later Sara was sitting in the break room eating her lunch, she was thinking of asking him out on a date, after all, they _had _went out for lunch last week, and they were getting closer, what did she have to lose? Well, her job, maybe, his friendship, but she knew he wouldn't fire her, she was one of his best workers.

She saw him pass the break room. _'It's now or never, Sara' _she sighed, getting up from her seat and following him. She was catching up to him when he stopped at the AV lab, she sighed and stopped, pretending to be looking at something, she saw him talking to Archie then move away marking something on his clip board, she took a deep breath and walked faster towards him, she was just behind him when a man stopped Grissom.

"Mr Grissom, I have your phone messages" The man said.

"Thank you"

Grissom carried on walking to his office, Sara behind him still, he walked into his office. _'Finally' _she thought. A man walked in after him.

She stopped, smiling, it just wasn't meant to be. She walked away; she was almost back to the break room when the lab exploded. She was thrown backwards and hit the floor with such force it winded her, she opened her eyes, gasping, she looked around her, Greg was in front of her, he raised his head but it was clear he was in too much pain, he put it back down. It took Sara a while to realise that the fire alarm was going off and that there was glass everywhere. She was amazed that she got out with just a cut on her head, a few bruises and one serious gash on her hand where she had put it in glass.

Later, she was sitting on the curb, her head was jumbled from everything that had just happened, there were paramedics everywhere, she had seen most of them and so far there was no sign of Hank, which was a good thing for her, she didn't want to see him again. Ever.

Grissom had seen her sitting alone on the curb, looking dazed and confused, he knelt down in front of her.

"You okay?" He asked gently.

It took her a while to realise he had said something to her, she turned to him. "Uh-huh"

He noticed her hand; he took it in his gently, "Honey, this doesn't look too good"

"It's fine"

He had known her too long to believe those two words.

She continued, "Cleanup's going to be something, we should get started"

He was concerned about her, he couldn't give a damn about cleanup at that moment "You need stitches"

She couldn't get stitches, mainly because she was scared Hank would be there, "I'm okay"

He pulled her up with him holding her arm, "Would you take care of her hand, please?" He shouted to anyone that would listen.

Later that evening, Sara was walking towards Grissom's office, she knew he had the night off, she had her chance and she would take it.

"You... Got a minute?" She said, leaning against his doorframe.

"I was just leaving"

"Yeah, the, schedule says you're off tonight"

"I am"

'_I knew that' _"Me... Too" This was harder than she imagined, she mentally kicked herself for not thinking about how awkward it was to talk to Grissom about something non work-related.

"You should be on paid leave" He said, taking his glasses off and putting them in his shirt pocket.

"I'm fine"

He knew she wasn't.

"You were fortunate. And I'm not talking about the explosion"

She had followed officers into a house, she was told not to, and she could have been seriously injured.

"You... uh, talked to Brass?"

"And Nick"

"We got the guy" She said quietly.

He stood up, walking towards the door, but stopped.

"Is that all you have to say?"

This was her moment.

"Would you like to have dinner with me?"

His breath caught in his throat, of course he would, but his hearing was stopping him, he could be in a conversation and not hear what she was saying, she might think he wasn't bothered and leave. There were so many reasons he couldn't do that.

"No"

Sara was taken aback, he hadn't hesitated.

"Why not? Let's... Let's have dinner... Let's see what happens"

"Sara..." He paused, sighing, he knew he had sounded harsh, there were so many things he wanted to say to her, but he didn't know how. "... I don't know what to do about this" He motioned between them with his hands; he was talking about the sexual tension he could feel between them, about their shared looks, about his feelings for her.

She nodded. "I do"

They stared at each other for a moment.

"You know, by the time you figure it out, it could be too late" She turned, walking out of the lab, clearly heartbroken.

He stared after her, taking a step forward, he would have stopped her, he would have stopped her and told her his feelings for her, kissed her, drove her home, made love to her. He would have... If he had the guts to, if it wasn't putting his job at risk.

He turned his office lights off and left the building, hoping he wouldn't bump into her.

**A/N: So, what do you think? **


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry! I've been really busy, exams are starting soon so don't expect regular updates, hopefully this will make up for it **

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter twenty five

Since her dinner invitation, things had gone downhill, they avoided each other as much as possible, but it wasn't just Grissom and Sara who could feel the tension, the whole lab could. They were both as upset about it as the other, and they both wanted to fix it as much as the other.

The end of a very long shift was arriving, and Sara was debating whether to stop by his office or not, like she used to, when everything was fine between them, she needed to get things sorted between them, find out if he wanted to start all over again, build up their friendship. After minutes of sitting in the locker room thinking it over, she decided it would have to be done.

"Griss?" He looked up when he heard her soft voice coming from his doorway.

"Sara?" She smiled at him, that smile that made his heart melt.

"Um, we need to talk" She came straight out with it, no beating around the bush.

"Okay, have a seat" He gestured towards the chair that stood opposite his.

She pushed herself off the doorframe gently and sat down. "Listen, I don't know what your problem is with me, but it bothers me" _'That came out harsher than I intended' _She thought, but she didn't crack.

"Sara, what makes you think I have a problem with you?" He took his glasses off, his usual 'I'm talking serious' look across his face.

"The way you act around me, you don't talk to me like you used to, if you do talk to me it's about a case, we barely work together now, and you don't come out for breakfast with the team, so I guess it's pretty obvious you have some sort of problem with me." She sighed and crossed her arms across her chest.

Grissom pinched the bridge of his nose, her eyes closed tight. He let out a breath. "Sara, I don't know what it is between us, but it makes it harder to talk to you, and I know you know that too, I know you do"

"Well do something about it, because I want us to be able to talk again" She sighed, smiling slightly him. "I'm sure the whole lab is sick of the tension between us, too"

"I'm sure they are, I'm sick of Catherine coming here and telling me to do something about it" He sighed. "Listen, have breakfast with me, we'll talk about this more"

Sara looked at him, shocked that he would ask that. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, go to the locker room, I'll see you there"

"Um, Okay then" She rose from her chair and slowly walked away, unaware of the grin plastered on his face. She wasn't sure what to make of his invitation, what did he mean by "talk about this more"? It wasn't like him to just, invite her out like that.

She didn't even remember walking to the locker room, but she found herself sitting on the bench getting her purse out and changing her shoes.

"Ready?" She heard him behind her. Her heart stopped.

"Yeah" She wondered if he heard her, she could barely hear herself.

"Come on then" He gently pulled her up by her elbow, and walked her out of the building.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see"

**A/N: Short chapter I know, but I felt like it would be good to end it there **** This was my own take on how things got started at the start of season 4, by the way.**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Well I updated sooner than expected **** This chapter will (hopefully) be longer than the last ^.^**

**Hidden Emotions**

Chapter Twenty Six

They had been driving for at least fifteen minutes when Sara realised that he was taking her to his house.

"Grissom, why are you taking me to your place?" She looked at him from the corner of her eye; this was not like him at all.

"Because I want to" Of course, it was just like him to play mind games with her, she should have expected that; she had known him for the best of six years, and it's all he ever did.

He pulled into the drive of his townhouse; he got out and walked quickly around to her side of the car to help her out, causing more confusion for her.

Walking towards the front door he put his hand on her lower back, she was sure that as soon as this day was over, things would be back to normal, but for now she'd enjoy it, whatever it was.

They got in and he threw his keys on the table next to the door, Sara stood awkwardly in the middle of the room looking around, Grissom walked over to her and took her jacket from her shoulders.

"Have a seat, Sara" He told her softly.

"Seriously, Grissom, why are you doing this?" She sighed.

He glanced at her from where he stood, hanging her jacket up near the door, she really was beautiful, in a natural way, she didn't make herself beautiful, she didn't need to, she wasn't fake in any way. She didn't need to try. "I told you: because I want to"

"There's another reason, I know there is, Grissom"

"I'll explain while we eat"

She nodded and looked around awkwardly while he scurried around making breakfast, whatever it was he was making, it smelled nice.

She noticed a lot of butterflies on his walls and shelves, nothing had changed since she was last here, when they were working on a case he couldn't; it was still spacious, but he had rearranged it. She noticed a few pictures, so she got up to look at them.

One of the pictures was of him and a dog, presumably his, but he looked a lot younger, probably around the time he had lectured her. Another picture was of him crouching down next to an old woman in a wheelchair, she guessed it was his mother.

"Hey, Griss?" She called over to him standing in the kitchen.

"Yeah?" He could get used to Sara being around him in his home, normally he would consider it _his_, nobody else's, but this felt... Natural.

"Who's in these pictures?

He turned down the heat so the pancakes he was making wouldn't burn while he was away from them, and walked over to where she stood.

His voice in her ear gave her a shock, she noticed how close he stood to her."The woman in the wheelchair is my mother, she's deaf, it's how I know sign language, she isn't in a wheelchair anymore, that was a couple of years ago when she broke her leg." He smiled, remembering the day the picture was taken. He pointed to the dog. "That's my old dog, Buster, I had him when I lived in another house, about six or seven years back, he died not long after I came back from your lecture" Once again he smiled, remembering times he had with Buster. Grissom pointed to another picture she hadn't yet looked at, it was him with a woman, her heart stopped slightly. "This one is of me and my ex wife, we split up years back, I just like to keep the photo as a little memory, we were married for about two years, we split up a couple of month before I came to Harvard to lecture."

"Do you still love her?" Sara asked quietly, dreading the answer.

He sighed; he hadn't seen this one coming. "I guess... A little part of me will always love her, not in a romantic way, but if I ever saw her again those feelings would still be there, I'll never love her in the same way again, I guess I'd love her as if she was my sister" He glanced at Sara, checking her facial expressions. "She was the first woman I ever loved properly, at least that's what I thought at the time, I guess I was wrong"

Sara's eyes widened, and she quickly walked back to where she was sat.

A few minutes later Grissom walked over to where they sat with pancakes.

"I know you're vegetarian so these were the easiest things to make" He smiled handing her the plate.

Sara smiled back at him as she took it from him, they ate quietly, wondering how to break the silence.

"Okay, are you going to tell me why you've done this for me?" She sighed, after a long, painful silence.

Grissom put his knife and fork down on his plate and sighed. He would have to explain things sooner or later, and as much as he'd prefer to choose later, he knew he couldn't, so sooner it was.

"Okay, Sara, you and I both know that there is, well... Something... Between us, and you made that clear when you asked me to dinner a few months back, and there were many reasons I turned you down, it's not that I didn't want to go out to dinner with you, I would've loved to, it was because I knew I couldn't" He paused, leaving her no less clear.

"That still doesn't explain breakfast." She said slowly

"I'm not finished. The reason I asked you to breakfast today is because, you're right, we do have things to discuss, and I also want to apologize for making things between us so hard in the past few months, I also feel bad for turning down the dinner invitation" He smiled sadly when he finished.

"I... Um, don't really know what to say, except, apology accepted"

"Sara, there'll always be something between us, whether anything will come from it or not, well I guess time will tell, and I don't know if whatever it is, is a good thing or not, but time will also be the judge of that, I guess"

She smiled; at least she knew that he felt the same way. "That's enough to get me through for now, Grissom"

He nodded and they carried on eating quietly


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: You guys probably hate me, I don't blame you, hehe. Life had been pretty crazy lately, finishing school, sorting college stuff out, and I had major writers block, I keep on saying that I'll try and update regularly, but yeah, I don't. Sorry! Hopefully this chapter will make up for my lazyness! **

**Hidden Emotions  
**Chapter Twenty Seven

Since their breakfast together all those weeks ago, things were better between Grissom and Sara, they noticed this, and so did the whole lab. People were starting to wonder what was happening between them, it was becoming the talk of the lab.  
Grissom and Sara were making the most of their new found friendship, they would have breakfast together at his at least once a week, sometimes even go out together to a fair, or just go shopping together. Today, on one of their rare days off, they had decided to go shopping together, Grissom had phoned Sara.

Sara had been sitting at the island in her kitchen, doing the crossword in her paper, drinking a glass of orange juice, and eating pasta, when her phone rang.

"Ugh, it's Grissom, he better not want me in the lab." She mumbled to herself as she checked the caller I.D.

"Hello?" She sighed.

_"Sara, it's Grissom"_ She heard from the other end.

"Yeah, I guessed that, Grissom, I do have caller I.D" She smiled at his evident embarrassment.

_"Oh, yeah, sorry.." _He was struggling to ask her, he didn't know why, '_come on Grissom, it's only shopping, it's not like you're asking her to move in with you'_

"Grissom. What do you want?" She got down from her stool and wandered her small flat, checking the fridge, seeing it empty she sighed.

_"I was, um, wondering, if you want to... Well, I was going to go down to the supermarket... I was wondering if you wanted to maybe, come with me? I was going to get something to eat, maybe a coffee, so, I would like it if you, came with me... I mean, obviously you don't have to, but..."_

Sara laughed, they had gone shopping together before but most times it had been accidental, either bumping into each other or talking about things they wanted to buy at work and deciding to go with eachother.

"I would love to, Grissom"

_"Great! I'll see you down there?"_

"Sure, bye, Grissom" She hung up and hurried to get her jacket and shoes, she smiled as she remembered his struggle to ask her to go with him, and how happy he had been when she said she would love to. That was one thing that was quite funny about Grissom, he never got nervous about things "normal" people would get nervous about, but things "normal" people wouldn't think twice about.

She checked herself in the mirror, grabbed her car keys and left her flat. Walking down the stairs she passed her neighbor, Julie, they weren't as close as Sara would like them to be, but Julie still looked out for Sara, she was at least twice Sara's age. Julie was a widow, her husband died in their house fire, which is why Julie had moved into these flats, before Sara had even moved to Vegas._  
_  
"Hello Sara, dear" She smiled gently.

"Julie! Hi, how are you today?" Sara always made sure to stop and make small talk when she saw her dear neighbor.

"As good as any other day, what about you, honey?"

"I'm fine, thankyou, I'm going out with a friend, actually, to do some shopping"

"Oh, well isn't that nice? There's nothing better than a girly day out shopping!"

Sara's smile faltered, "Um, actually, it's my supervisor from work, _he_ invited me"

"Oh dear! I'm sorry, I shouldn't have presumed you were going with a girl, there's nothing wrong with clothes shopping with a man!"

_"well this is awkward" _Sara thought. "Actually, it's food shopping"

"Oh, sorry, again! I better shut up now, it's just that I don't think I ever remember you going food shopping"

"I know, I know, it's fine, I used to order in all the time, but that changed about two years ago, I'm vegetarian now" This conversation proved to Sara how little her and her neighbor knew about each other.

"Dear, I'll leave you to it now, I need to be getting in anyway, my neices are coming in about an hour, I need to cook dinner for us"

"Okay, Julie, i'll see you later"

"Yes Sara dear, you will"

They both walked in their opposite directions, Sara hurried because her little conversation held her up a little.

When she got to the supermarket she noticed Grissoms Mercedes right away, she smiled and walked over to it, tapping on the window, she noticed he had fell asleep. She tapped harder and he jumped, banging his knee he cursed, then turned and noticed her, grinning he got out of the car.

"You're late." He told her, giving her the "Grissom" look.

"Sorry, my neighbor stopped to chat, she thought that when I said I was going "shopping" I meant, "Girly shopping" you know, clothes, makeup, that kinda stuff.

"I don't think I make a very good girl, actually" He said as they started walking towards the entrance.

"I don't know, you'd be surprised what a skirt can do!" They laughed, it felt good to have their friendship back

**A/N: Hopefully I'll update again soon! **


End file.
